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I just Didn't Need this Today ......Pat 2 by Restless.

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Posted 6/10/2008 3:01 PM (GMT 0)
I just didn't need this today  by Restless

 

 Posted Today 12:33 AM (GMT -6)    VIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGE
Today i had a good sleep and feel so much better for it .I had to see the dr this morning and she said i needed to go on antibiotics for this bug as my chest is so bad so will pick them up this afternoon when i drop my son to work .While there she wrote out a referral to see the new psychologist on thursday and told me that i really need to see her and not put it off any longer .I know she is right but i just do not want to bring all the past up again .I will have the little bub i care for on that day so it will be hard not sure what i`m going to do i really can`t take her there with me and yet i don`t want to leave her home with my daughter for obvious reasons.But will see how i feel tomorrow .
Sherly how are things going in your neck of the woods .Are your children at home or do they attend school through the day .My youngest has just arrived home from school and at four he works in the pharmacy for a couple of houre but he is never a problem as he is helpful most of the time .
It didn`t take long before my daughter was at me again it was s much more pleasant here last week when she was away and all i can do is look forward to the next time she goes .She said she will miss my birthday and i really do not care what she thinks anymore and will enjoy it more without her.Anyway i`m over birthdays now i never look forward to them as it only reminds me so much of everything i have missed out on in my life.
Getting by i really do not plan on her changing but more look forward to the day she moves out then i think i will be more able to handle all my other problems .I just think that life will begin for hubby and me after that as for the past twenty years our lives have revolved around this one child .Even my other kids can see what she has done to the family .No matter what i do or try i just fail so i have given up now .Each day i wake up i`m one more day closer to the day she will leave .
Restless

~  we can not judge anyone unless we have walked in their shoes and have live through what they live through ~
Posted 6/10/2008 3:02 PM (GMT 0)
Restless

I think I need to get onto your case a little bit. I understand that you love watching this child,BUT. You need to take care of your first. Obviously no one else is going to help you,so please figure out a way to get into that doctor. Even if it means that you tell the parents that you can't watch her for a day. I am sure they know that you have health problems,so this is something that they probably except to happen once in awhile.

I really think your daughter needs to move out now, she is doing nothing but harm to you and your family.
You have to focus on healing from everything that you have been through. I wish your husband would put his foot down.

Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

Posted 6/10/2008 3:03 PM (GMT 0)
Posted Today 7:31 AM (GMT -6)    VIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGE
Hi Restless,

I think that Shy is right, you need to keep your appointments. You need to take care of you. I know that you are waiting for the day that your daughter moves out to get some type of normalcy out of life, but can that continue to wait on her? Either way you are in my thoughts and prayers. Maybe you have a jpoint of letting everything play out with time. We just worry about you and want you better now. But that is easier said than done. So try to keep yourself top priority and move on with what you are comfortable with.

Thinking of you
luv and hugs, Karen...

  Moderator-Depression

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 6/10/2008 3:04 PM (GMT 0)
 Posted Today 8:00 AM (GMT -6)    VIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGE
Restless, I amhanging inthere, same ole same ole.

I am glad you got some rest last night.

I do not envy you, and I know my time will come where I am in the same position, telling the kids to leave, i think they thnk they are gonna stay here forever. I will go nuts if that happens, they do not understand the pain i feel, nor will they ever. Dont think my husband will eiather.

Ever since my son was born then my daughter, his train of thought is its all about the kids, he has not got his proirties straight.

enough about me, this is about you, the sooner you get her out, the happier you will be, that sounds mean, but true, and only hope you and your husband can have a life again, something I dont think will happen with my situation.

I know all this easier said then done. beleive me i know easier said then done. My thoughts and prayers are with you, dont lose hope....

 

God Bless,and have a Great Day!!.......Love.....Sheryl

xcema,hypermobile,Chronic Bronchitus,Fatigue,Positive ANAFibro-05--Had surgery on left & right knees 06, Interstial Cystitis-06  implanted Interstim-06 hysterectomy & IBS-06 Arthiritus-04 Depression-04GERDS/ Hiatial hernia -07   Anxiety-07 Gastroparesis-08--Occasional Migraines Reglan,Protonix,Prozac,Wellbutrin,Erthomyicin,klonipin,occasional phernergan Im marrried 2 children, one with mild autism, Bipolar(8), she takes Abilify, Buspar, Celexa Son(13) is bipolarw/migraines, Topamax, ZantacGod plz grant me the =adlinkMouseOver(event,this,5); style="POSITION: static; TEXT-DECORATION: underline! important" onclick=adlinkMouseClick(event,this,5); onmouseout=adlinkMouseOut(event,this,5); href="http://forums.dealofday.com/showthread.php?t=203489#" target=_top>serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference..." Plz help HW to help others by donating: https://www.healingwell.com/donate/

Posted 6/10/2008 3:12 PM (GMT 0)
 Posted Today 10:06 AM (GMT -6)    VIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGEVIEW IMAGE
Hi Restless, I dont mean to trivialise all you are going through but was so interested ,(on waking feeling Anxious) about your life with your Family and similaritys I have had, I loved hearing about the Joey, I adore animals and live in CAlifornia actually am an American/Brit  yesterday I saw a red snake and am still trying to figure out what kind it was my neighbor assured me it wasnt poisonous,I felt fine yesterday but today I dont. Maybe writing about your Family would help you , a journal, as I said I dont mean to trivialise it your feelings Familys are hard I have 2 Daughters that drive me daft and they dont even live with me, but there is always a fight going on between them with me in the Middle , my husband says I should leave them alone and they would learn, but thats not an easy thing to do , they live here and the UK so its mostly phione or e-mail Fighting anyway.I do hope you get plenty to do and please let us know On HW all the Joeys etc you look after.
Back to

Posted 6/10/2008 3:31 PM (GMT 0)
Jane I hope you are resting today to recover from your trip..
Posted 6/10/2008 9:49 PM (GMT 0)
Morning sheryl ,I did rest yesterday as i didn`t have the energy to do anything just preparing the evening meal was exhausting i don`t like feeling like this hoping that once the anti biotics are in my system i will start to improve .the depression is just so hard to deal with but this bug has made it ten times worse.
Today i have a bit of running around to do my son goes to the chiropractor again today and i`s raining so will have to drop him to and from school and do a bit more running around also .I want to get in and give the house a bit of a clean it didn`t take long before it looked like a bad storm had hit it .I know i will not get any help from my daughter so the sooner i get in and do it the better .I have to take a bird down to the vets this morning i collected it from a member of the public yesterday it has swollen ankles and has been plucking it`s feathers out so thought i had better get it checked out before i can release it safely.
My little joey i`m caring for was so small when he first came in he only weighed 645grams and had no fur at all not sure what his present weight is but he is just starting to get some fur and is so much more active now he sticks his head out of the tempory pouch i made him and looks around .He is a Western Gray Kangaroo joey and i will look after him for the next twelve or so months until he is ready to be released back to be free.I care for sick injured or orphaned native animals along with the little children i care for .
Iwas asked to make a journal but i can`t do that because my daughter is constantly going through all my draws and cupboards and steals my belongings and i know things that i would write about are not the things i would ever want anyone else to see not even her as i know she would just use it to hurt me even furthur and i really don`t need that .
I just try to stay clear of my daughter as thats the only way i can cope ,she goes out of her way to make my life so hard .I know hubby has given her her last warning ( i don`t know how many last warnings she has had ) but if she doesn`t help he said she is leaving ( i really can`t see him kicking her out ) she just adds a smart comment to everything he says when he is far enough away so as not to hear them .
As for attending the therapist tomorrow i`m hoping my oldest daughter will be on night shift she will look after the little one for me i will give her a ring later today to check if she can.I know i need to see her but then i really do not like letting people down when i have made that committment i think i get it from being let down by others so much in my life it really does make me feel so bad when i do it .
Well i had better get some washing done before the son gets up and wants a lift to school .
Restless
Posted 6/10/2008 10:35 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Restless,

You are so sweet to take in animals like you do. I am an animal lover also and it takes a special person to do that. I commend you for what you are doing. I have raised baby birds before a couple times. It is a lot of work to keep them fed. And it is sad when you have to set them free, but you have to. I have taken in abused dogs also.

I hope that you start feeling better soon. Have a great day.

hugs, Karen...
Posted 6/11/2008 2:06 PM (GMT 0)
You got your day cut out for you, remember to set aside some time for you.

I am glad you help orphaned animals. It does take a speical person to do that.

I hope your appt goes well. I have mine tommorow afternoon, have to take daughter with me, not gonna leave her alone with son.

Im so sorry you have to put up with your daughter. I guess the best hting to do is avoid her.

You are in my thoughts and prayers...

Posted 6/12/2008 11:20 AM (GMT 0)
This afternoon i feel so down i saw the new therapist today and as i knew it bought up a lot of things ,I even told her of my ( PLAN) she was surprised at what i had planned to do ,This is not how i want to feel she then told me she will be back in a month well thats no good i now have to deal with all this again by myself .i`M NOT GOING BACK to see her again i really don`t care what happens now .I have hubby and my daughter to contend with for the next four days and i can`t face them all all that goes on .
The only reason i`m getting up tomorrow is because jess is coming for the last time this week and only a couple more days early next week she is the only reason why i even bother and when she goes well who knows .
The therapist said just think how it would effect my family well i really don`t care .I have nothing lfet to give anyone .
I can`t use my lap top until next month so am restricted to computer use now .
Restless
Posted 6/12/2008 11:46 AM (GMT 0)
Restless

What is your plan.. please talk to us

I will check my email as much as I can. We are in the middle of a flood here,and I don't know how long we will have our utilities,but if you can't reach me,you can reach Kitt or Darren.


Please let us know
Posted 6/12/2008 12:20 PM (GMT 0)
Restless,

You can always email me also. My address is in my profile, or you can click on the blue box under my name. Please let me know what is going on in your mind and heart. I am getting so worried about you and you mean so much to all of us. You are a wonderful person and you are needed. Think of all the animals that you help, they are God's creatures. That means so much. You Are Needed. You Are Loved. I know it seems so hard at times, but these trying times are for a reason. To give us compassion for others and to teach us that there is a higher power to look upon. To appreciate the good times, and to build character in us. So please don't follow through with your plan. We are here for you.

Luv and hugs, Karen...
Posted 6/12/2008 1:15 PM (GMT 0)
Restless you can email me too, I think I emailed you once. what is your plan, you said you discussed it with the ew therapist, what did she say about it.

you can call me to if you want, to email me i will give you my number. we are all concerened about. If not get up for anything, at least get up for yourslef, and the little joey, and all the other animals you help as karen said. Please keep us posted, we are are worried about you, and we care about you, and love you, you are important to us and have helped alot of people here, that is a reason to get up we need you....

Posted 6/12/2008 1:16 PM (GMT 0)
Kitt I hope your utilities dont go out, maybe you should be going to higher ground, and how are you feeling?
Posted 6/12/2008 2:46 PM (GMT 0)

Hey, I may look like I was in the movie "Mini Texas Chain Saw Massacre" but I am at 75 % today.............and I am on the high ground.  LOL.

Now Dear Jane,

What is the Plan and exactly what is it that is  you running through  your head? You are still here with us and that to me is proof that part of you  wants to remain here with all of us. You are doing a positive thing and I am proud of you for that.

I know life looks bleak for you now but please get moving out of that dark hole and start heading toward the light.  Let go of all the "stinkin thinkin", and if you cannot stay in the living conditions you are in, I would beg you to consider making plans to move out. I feel a lot of anger in your posts.  Please try to let go of it piece by piece.  Anger holds you down.

All of the members here have shown you patience, sympathy, acceptance.  They do not judge and only support and love you.  Are you willing to give up on us?  I think not but I do think your son's anniversay is what is pushing you further down right now.

Maybe take a bit of time away from home. Be carefree.  Do what ever you want. Just go to someplace you always wanted to see, get a nice hotel, sleep in, take long walks and let all the bad thought drift away.  Smile and say hello to the people on the street.  You may be helping someone else.  A smile can work miracles.

Talk to us and then let's think about starting a positive post for you where you can journal you day and really highlight  the good in your day.

Be at Peace

Do not look forward in fear to the changes of life;

Rather look to them with full hope that as they arise,
God, whose very own you are, will lead you safely
through all things;

And when you cannot stand it, God will carry you
in His arms.

Do not fear what may happen tomorrow;

The same everlasting Father who cares for you today
will take care of you today and every day.

He will either shield you from suffering or will give you
unfailing strength to bear it.

Be at peace and put aside all anxious thoughts and
imaginations.

St. Francis de Sales

Hugs to you my friend,
Kitt

 


Posted 6/12/2008 4:58 PM (GMT 0)

Hi Restless,

Im really sorry that your new therapist isnt working out. Im not sure what this plan is that you are talking about but reading between the lines, I think it is something you need to talk to someone about. Please feel free to email me if you need to. If ypou are really feeling low, please talk to someone:

1800-784-2433 / 1800-273-8255 / 1800-799-4889 (US Suicide helplines)

1300-384-566 (LifeLink Samaritans - Tazmania)

Darren

Posted 6/13/2008 2:58 AM (GMT 0)

Hey Restless

No posts from you today so I am going to follow Darren's lead here:

AUSTRALIAN CAPITAL TERRITORY

Crisis Assessment and Treatment Team (CAT Team) - 1800 629 354 or 6205 1065
24 hour service
Assessment and treatment of mentally ill people in crisis situations.

NATIONWIDE

Lifeline - 13 11 14
(24 hour service)

I am praying for you.

Kitt


Posted 6/13/2008 11:25 AM (GMT 0)
Restless

Please check in.... As you can see we are all worried about you.
Posted 6/13/2008 1:41 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Restless, we are all concerned and worried about you, getting away sounds like a good iodea. Please take heed of all the suggestions given to you, we all love and care about you, please post, or email one of us, or call one of us, we are worried about you...
Posted 6/18/2008 1:29 PM (GMT 0)
Restless, its been awhile and havent heard from you, please let us know how you are doing...
Posted 6/18/2008 3:14 PM (GMT 0)

Dear Restless,

It has been 6 days now since your posted to us.  I think it is time for you to get back in here with your family, don't you?  We are here and we care so let us know you are ok. 

Gentle Hugs
Kitt

Posted 6/18/2008 7:38 PM (GMT 0)
hi restless,im new to this forum,im in the uk too.its sounds to me you need some me time ,youve got to make time foryourself and be good to yourself.your in  a really negative situation and could do  with being round those who respect you and treat you well otherwise your wellbeing will be even more compromised.have you thought about going and getting some gentle healing,oran aromatherapy session.both good for the soul and good for the mind.when our lives are going this wayour physical,mental health are put under stress as is our emotional wellbeing.a lot of us dont think about our spiritual selves .by that i dont really mean our faith or religeous beliefs(im  not some religious fanatic,no disrespect though to those of you who are)i mean loooking after our soul our spiritaul self that needs maintaining too otherwise we end up feeling not whole.that can be done in many ways like reiki,spiritual healing yoga,etc. have a think about it and dont knock it until youve tried it.ive experienced alot of what youve experienced and as i believe theres more to heaven and earth that what  you see in front of you.email me if you want any  more details,good luck tigereye in the uk

Posted 6/18/2008 7:41 PM (GMT 0)

Jane,

Hey girlfriend, this is Kitt, and I need your support.............won't you please check in.  Hugs
Kitt

Posted 6/18/2008 7:42 PM (GMT 0)

hi restless,i forgot to add on ,that  perhaps you shouldnt put your life on hold,ie til your child leaves home because before you know it your lifes over and youve missed out on so much and youve found your so ill or miserable or just plain burnt out and tired to do anything anymore.

take tigereye in the uk

Posted 6/18/2008 7:44 PM (GMT 0)
Jane,

I really miss you, could you just post and let us know if you are okay?

Luv and hugs,
Karen...
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