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Depression or Bipolar Part 2, for Tesslynn84

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Depression
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Posted 8/10/2009 2:13 AM (GMT 0)
i posted earlier today but it's not showing. i feel like crying for no reason but i can't
Posted 8/10/2009 3:45 AM (GMT 0)
well thinking about my mom definitely makes me cry
Posted 8/10/2009 5:18 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Tess,

You sound so sad. I feel bad about it. I am sorry that thinking of your mom makes you cry. But maybe you needed a good cry. Sometimes it is really cleansing. I hope that you are feeling better.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/10/2009 5:21 AM (GMT 0)
yeah ever since i went back on zoloft i almost never cry and i think i need to a lot i feel worse when i need to cry but can't
Posted 8/10/2009 5:21 AM (GMT 0)
gonna try to fall asleep now, if i can't then i'll probably cry some more
Posted 8/10/2009 5:26 AM (GMT 0)
Sweet dreams dear Tesslynn. You are very special and I hope that you know that...

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/11/2009 2:58 AM (GMT 0)
thanks karen

the first two hours of work today were horrible, after that it was just a long day. now i'm trying to put off the depression that's trying to come back
Posted 8/11/2009 4:32 AM (GMT 0)
I have faith in you Tess,

You can keep the bad thoughts away if you try to stay busy. Maybe read a book or start a hobby that you like to do. Something to take your mind off of things.

Talk to you again soon.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/11/2009 4:33 AM (GMT 0)
i was at work so i couldn't do anything like that
Posted 8/11/2009 4:46 AM (GMT 0)
Are there things at work that you can do to stay busy? I thought that you meant that you felt bad when you got home. My mistake. Try to focus on what you are doing at the time. Live within the moment. Try not to let your mind wander into these bad patterns of thinking. This is where CBT would come in handy. You learn to stay in the 'now'. And focus on what you are doing.

Take care Tesslynn,

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/11/2009 7:03 AM (GMT 0)
my job just doesn't take up enough brain space
Posted 8/11/2009 4:06 PM (GMT 0)
There are always things that you can find to do on your job. What kind of work do you do? I work in a convenience store, so that takes my mind off of everything, it is really busy. When I am not busy with customers, there is always cleaning and filling things to do. So there is no boredom there. It goes by so fast.

Maybe you need a more fullfilling job. You are a wonderful person Tesslynn. So don't think badly of yourself. You are smart. You could probably do anythign that you want to do. I feel that you have that ability.

Keep posting, best wishes for a wonderful day.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/12/2009 1:34 AM (GMT 0)
i work for the post office and there's never any downtime.

i've been looking for another job but anything better i'm not qualified for and i can't handle going back to school.

i'm really depressed today, feeling kinda sick and no energy. and it doesn't matter how healthy i eat i still feel sick.
Posted 8/12/2009 4:11 PM (GMT 0)
If there is never any downtime, you should be busy enough to keep your mind off of things. Try to focus on what you are doing and live in the now. In the moment. Pay attention to the situation at hand. This leaves no place for your mind to wander to.

I hope that you are having a better day today. Please try to focus on what you are doing and try not to let your mind wander. There are many self help books out there that can help you concentrate so that your mind inslnt wandering about sad or bad things.

Remember we are here for you.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/13/2009 5:32 AM (GMT 0)
i spend half of my time at work sorting mail and the other half delivering. i'm taking dialectic behavior therapy to help with my thoughts.

i went to volleyball tonight even though i was already really tired but i'm glad i went.
Posted 8/13/2009 6:30 AM (GMT 0)
good tess. sometimes you have to push yourself past some big barriers. i do this daily!! and you know it reminds me that my internal and external fortitudes are strong and stronger than i thought. keep fightin'.

NEVER SURRENDER!!WITH LOVING COMPASSION. jamie

Posted 8/13/2009 7:21 AM (GMT 0)
yeah every single day at work i think atleast once that i'm not gonna make it through the day, but i almost always do and i don't even know how. atleast it's getting less miserable while i'm there.

i'd better try to get to sleep now incase i get called into work tomorrow.
Posted 8/13/2009 11:25 AM (GMT 0)
good nite, and keep well. stay strong. jamie
Posted 8/13/2009 8:37 PM (GMT 0)
got plenty of sleep and still tired
Posted 8/13/2009 11:19 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Tess,

I have to work the next few days so I wont be on much. But I wanted to say that I am proud of you for doing such a good job.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/14/2009 4:38 AM (GMT 0)
i went to dbt group today and i was miserable while i was there. i don't feel like i learned anything and i spent the whole time thinking about bad things that have happened to me.
Posted 8/14/2009 4:53 AM (GMT 0)
me tired and anxious. i have pushed hard this week........still more pushing to be done. keep focused. jamie. u are doin' well.
Posted 8/14/2009 6:41 AM (GMT 0)
tired and thinking there's no point to life
Posted 8/14/2009 4:01 PM (GMT 0)
Do you go to any one on one counseling Tess? YOu should let them know where your thoughts are and maybe go over that.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/15/2009 4:52 AM (GMT 0)
i'm now going to individual and group counselling once a week each. the one on one is really intense. seems like when i go i get so upset that it takes me a few days to start feeling better then i have to go again. seems like it's counter productive.
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