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Treatment update, for Jenn

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Posted 12/8/2009 4:01 PM (GMT 0)
New thread started for Jenn as the other one got long.  And I wanted her and everybody else to keep posting.  So from now on let's post on this thread for Jenn.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 12/8/2009 4:04 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Karen you are the best!!

Hugs.....Jenncool

Posted 12/9/2009 2:30 AM (GMT 0)
the best. jamie. scool scool scool
Posted 12/9/2009 3:40 AM (GMT 0)

To us all sunshinescool scool scool

working on about 6 inches of snow now......still coming down and the wind is rapid.  Kids hoping for a snow day:)

Stay warm......Cheers....Jenn

Posted 12/9/2009 3:45 AM (GMT 0)
keep warm and cool jenn!!!scool scool scool scool jamie
Posted 12/9/2009 3:52 AM (GMT 0)

Always coolscool scool scool

Not very warm at the moment.........Big snow thrower working tomorrow for suremad   I need to move south!!!scool

Warm hugs to you (although you don't need them warm it's summer thereturn ).....Jenn

Posted 12/9/2009 3:55 AM (GMT 0)
One more thing-

 

You both are awesome at directing me away from the issues for just a bit and get me chatting about life......THANK YOU !!!!!

 

You will never know what these little idle breaks mean to me.........smilewinkgrin

 

Love to you both......you are angels!

 

-Jenn

Posted 12/9/2009 4:32 AM (GMT 0)
life goes on, thus life is made of many facets, and to be living healthy we need to express them all equally. you are an angel. one of committment dedication and compassion. jamie.cool about 25c today, lovely.
Posted 12/9/2009 5:55 AM (GMT 0)
Got home from work tonight and hubby had made some chocolate chip cookies.  They were still warm.  So good.  Drinking coffee now, I drink it most of the day long when at home. 

I had a very good day at work, we were really busy, people stocking up for the storm that we are going to get tonight.  It is suppose to storm for about three days.  We shall see.  Maybe I will get my skis out.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 12/9/2009 8:13 AM (GMT 0)
be safe if you do. cookies and hot chocolate, mmm, the cookie monster may come a callin'!!!!!! time for a cuppa myself. done some work for my neighbour, incl my dishes, a load of washing, and have just done my bath and toilet mat. getting tired, need to some research for a paper. cheers karen, jamie.
Posted 12/9/2009 4:08 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Jamie,

You are the best!!!

Hugs, Karen
Posted 12/9/2009 5:46 PM (GMT 0)

You both sounds like you had awesome nights!!  Both well deserved!

I just finshed blowing 18 inches of wet heavy snow from my drive and walk.....sigh and it is still snowing, although looks as if the end is near.  Snow day for the kids today and I was told to stay home and work.....YIPPEE!!  I love working from home in my comfiestongue

DH braved it and drove in this morning, his usual 35 minute drive tookd about 90 minutes.  But he got there safe.  Now to get him home minus the crabbies he had yesterdaydevil

Glad to hear you both so well....keep up the smiles!

Hugs.....Jenn

Posted 12/10/2009 3:07 AM (GMT 0)
jenn, i think dh resuming some normality will be of great benefit to him. oh, i was watching the american news this morning, when it snows it does not muck about!! the weatherman was in 2 ft of snow and rugged up like he was in antartica!! so, keep warm. jamie.

karen, cheers. have a good day guys. jamiecool

Posted 12/10/2009 3:26 AM (GMT 0)
We got a good bit of snow last night. It is wet and heavy. My husband got out the snow blower and cleared out a lot of it.

We are suppose to get more for the next couple of days. I guess winter is here, though not technically until the 21st.

Have a good day you two.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 12/10/2009 12:18 PM (GMT 0)
Today we have bitter wind chills.....schools are delayed and hour.  Wind chill right now I think is 10 below zero, YIKES!!  No Jamie when it snows here it is many many inches.  SUCKS!!

DH hates his job so it is making him miserable to be around I just don't know how much more I can handle.  It is good that he is getting out of bed and going somewhere everyday that is for sure.  But his attitude and mood are awful.  I am at the end of my rope with his treatment of me and everyone else.  It's not right nor fair.

Oh well....I guess I will make the boys a big breakfast this morning now that I have an extra hour to killsmurf

Have a great day Karen and Jamie!!  Stay warm Karen!    -Jenn

Posted 12/10/2009 6:31 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Jenn,

I put a new ram chip in my computer this morning so it is running better. I am so happy.

We got more snow last night and suppose to snow all day today. Now comes the snowmobilers. Yuck. I guess if I had one, I wouldn't feel that way.

I am sorry that your husband isn't happy with his job. What about a different one? Maybe it is time for him to look elsewhere.

I hope that things fo better for you. You are such a sweet person. Keep on keeping on my friend.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 12/10/2009 11:17 PM (GMT 0)
hang in there my dear friend. keep yourself well. dh needs some reflective time i feel. keep warm and know that we care. jamie. would dh enefit from a chat with the dr. regarding a mood stabiliser? keep posting. jamie :-)
Posted 12/11/2009 1:01 AM (GMT 0)
He could yes but likely won't return until scheduled appt, 1/ 18/10.

I am afraid his reflective time is him not wanting to be married anymore.....which is what started this whole thing....he blames how he feels on work, than me etc etc.......so I let him reflect and then leave.....after all I have gone through??? 

Honestly I am ready for him to say that....will it hurt?? Absolutely....it will hurt.....but I am prepared.  His actions, mannerisms all point to that.  (tears)  So what do I do.....hang in there until he leaves?  Wow ....that would really suck.  So maybe I just do it for him instead of prolonging what it is he really wants?

Sorry.....really really bad week......and my favorite time of year......I love christmas and all it means.........so again it ends up sad when it should be joyous and happy.

Thanks for listening........I appreciate you both Karen and Jamie.......and I don't want to disclude anyone else who may need support.........everyone......Thank you!!

Hugs to all......stay warm.....-20 degrees wind chill.......BRRRRRR   Jenn

Posted 12/11/2009 2:00 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Jenn,

I am sorry that hb isn't coming around with his moods.  I would keep plugging along and if he wants to leave, so be it.  But I bet that wont last long.  I don't think he realizes what he is doing to you.  Too self centered right now.  But hopefully he will get better and realize this. 

It is cold here tonight too.  I went to a friends house and had a couple of beers.  Had to let the truck warm up for awhile before I came home.  Now I am nice and warm.

I really hope that things get better for you and for your husband.  I hope that he gets more help, maybe a mood stabilizer would help.

Best wishes,

Hugs, Karen

Posted 12/11/2009 2:16 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you Karen......You too deserved a night out and I am glad you got some time to enjoy this time of year no matter how cold the midwest is!!  Ours is coming your way.  Snuggle up it is chilly!!!

I am very glad tomorrow is friday although I do have to work tonight for a few hours starting at 11pm......I am 24/7 for the most part and parts of my job can't be done during clinic hours.....obviously hospital hours never end so they have to concede.  So more work to do....Dh already in bed has been for over an hour.

When you and Jamie talk of mood stabilizers....what do you mean??  I don't know the difference I guess.  He was on abilify??? Is that one??  Made him VERY violent after only two weeks........are there others?  You may be right and probably are.  How do I bring that up at his appt?  I don't want to come across as trying to tell the Doctor what to do......Which has happenedtongue   I am not strong willed or outspoken at allsmilewinkgrin

Thanks for the advice I need all I can get.....Geez I seem and feel helpless right now.....I am not usd to this.  I also don't like being in a relationship where I feel as if the other does not want to be part of it.......Been there done that.  Not fun.

Stay Warm Karen.......again glad you had a fun night out......Cheers again!!!  HUGS....Jenn

 

Posted 12/11/2009 6:14 AM (GMT 0)
sorry jenn, what you are going thru just plain sucks. heaps of others avail. epilim, tegratol, yeah anti-epelitics, but very good mood stabilisers. and others, trying to remember some. he is being very self centred. sorry for my defunct recommendation, sounds like he needs a darn good wake up call. wishing you well. jamie.
Posted 12/11/2009 3:23 PM (GMT 0)
One other mood stabilizer that I can remember is risperdol.  I took it for a while but gained weight on it, that is why I am now on abilify.  It has put my depression in remission, for now anyway...

I do agree your husband does need a wake up call, though I don't know how fragile he really is at this point.  But you are enduring a lot from him right now.  Good thing you are easy going.  Good for him anyway.  Other women may have kicked his butt out at this point.  But I know that you love him and are being very flexable right now with his treatment.  But when somebody is down like him, it can bring you down too.  Don't want to see that happening.  You could tell the doc that you read about mood stabilizers and ask him if he thinks that would help.  That way it isn't sounding like you are telling him what to do. 

I am waiting for the day that you say he is coming around with his thinking, I hope that comes soon.  For your sake, you are enduring a lot.  And I am sorry for that.  You are a good, kind and compassionate person and I know you are putting yourself in his shoes as not to get too upset with him.  Take care of you too.  You can only take so much.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 12/11/2009 3:47 PM (GMT 0)

Thank you Karen!!

I am taking sometime today to do some serious thinking.  I have always read that a persons actions/reactions to you are a true window to their feelings.  With that said it should be crystal clear to me that he does not care about me nor our marriage.  I have got to stop blaming his depression on his treament or lack there of towards me and maybe just start seeing it for what it is......his absence of love/feelings for me.  Fragile....I don't think so.....someone who is fragile is also humble...he is neither.  Other smart women would have kicked him out a year ago!!  WAKE UP JENN!!!

Kind of a bad road I have to go down I think and I have emailed him basically saying that email is the only medium in which I can talk to him where his indifference doesn't effect me......Told him what I am seeing/feeling from his actions and reactions to me and what that says to me and what my intuition is telling my heart.  I asked him for honesty and told him that is fair and I deserve it.....will it hurt if I am correct??  Absolutely......especially after all I have done for him in the last 18 months......and during our 10 years together.  But I will be ok......

So now I will see if he has the balls to tell me the truth or if he will just ignore my email and not respond.  Probably the latter which then just confirms my gut.

Another day in paradise!!  Can't beat it with 0 degree temps once againscool   It is friday however.......I feel a few beers in my futuresmilewinkgrin   Or maybe a crown and water by the christmas tree with christmas music playing!! 

More to follow I am sure.....Hugs and Many many Thanks!!!  -Jenn

Posted 12/11/2009 4:27 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Jenn,

I had a couple of beers last night, felt good.  And as for the crown royal,  all I can say is smooth.  That is a good wiskey.  The best. 

I like kaluah too.  Thinking about splurging and getting a bottle for the holidays.  I like it in my coffee.  I am a huge coffee drinker, I drink it all day long.  Coffee that is, not Kaluah.  (sp)...  lol...

I know how you feel about your husband.  It is so hard for you right now.  Know that we are here for you and support whatever situation that you make.  I hope that your husband comes around.  I hope that he opens up to you and that you can get through to him about how this is effecting you.  Let us know what is happening.

Best wishes to you Jenn.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 12/11/2009 4:44 PM (GMT 0)
I used to drink coffee too....but it started to make me have heart palpitations.....so I had to give it up.  Boy did that suck......2 week headache!  That's ok though I have enough energy for two people so it probably was good for my co-workers for me to stop drinking ittongue

Well the situation is what he is creating....I just have to make decisions I guess based on that.  Still no response from him.....why am I suprisedshocked

Gonna try and get out of here about noon today and head home to get a few things done before I get the boys from school.  Dogs can play in the snow........they have a blast!!  Although too cold to be out there to awful long.

I am doing my best hoping for the best but also trying to be realistic here.  Trying to take off the rose colored glasses and see things clearly.  I guess that's the problem with being an enternal pessmist......it's hard to see and accept that which is not.

Hugs Karen.......Jenn

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