help me.

Let me just set the story. I'm 15. I spent a year with a boy who I gave everything to. And then a girl comes along and takes him, literally takes him. And yes, that hurt, verry much, and messed me up inside- for a 2 weeks all i did was cry and sit in my room, and when i had to go to school, i would continue to cry. My school work went down because I was so unhappy. But thats not it. This girl made all her friends bully me. They shout stuff at me, they write stuff about me, and they get my ex to say stuff about me. Then tell me I'm worthless, scum, useless, pathetic, that I should die and various other things. I tried not to let it get to me. But it really hurts having to go to school everyday and having to face it, knowing whenever they see me they laugh at me, or whenever I see 'him' it hurts knowing he doesn't give a darn about everything we went through.

Things at home aren't too good either. I argue with my mum all the time. We have physical fights, and I normally end up in my room wishing I was dead. My mums boyfriend makes it clear what he thinks of me. They call me a slapper and a slag. I'm not innocent, like I do say stuff back, but these are my parents saying this stuff to me. And parents are meant to be the ones who help and make things better, but mine constantly tell me I'm worthless and stupid. I'm starting to belive it after all these people telling me I am.

I tried standing up to the girls at school. But it backfired, and I ended up being hurt so so much. And I ended up in hospital. I promised myself then that things were going to change, and they did. Things were looking up for a couple of days.

But now it's all going downhill again. I feel empty. Useless. I feel like theres no point living.

 I actually do.

I want to feel happy. I want to be having a nice time with my friends, but I can't tell them anything really, they would think I am crazy. I guess I am a bit crazy.

I'm scared I'm going to do something stupid.

I think I need advice.

Soon.

Thankyou.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 6/21/2010 2:22:20 PM (GMT-6)

Hey HWU

First of all forget what anybody says to you, you are beautiful girl, you have, on your own admission, made some mistakes and are not perfect. Well there isn't anyone on this earth who is perfect.

The bullying at school worries me, have you or can you involve a teacher that you can speak to in it? It has got to stop and I am sure the school does not condone bullying. But what worries me more are the "physical fights" at home that you spoke about. This has gone way too far and I have to say that your parents, especially your mother should have more sense.

You have to go and see your doctor, tell him what is going on at home and at school. I am sure he will intervene, get the authorities involved. Is it any wonder you're at your wits end, talking about ending it all.

Forget the boyfriend, boyfriends will come and go in your life until you find the right one. He is showing his immaturity by joining in with the bullies to call you names, they all need to grow up. But you are the main concern and I want you to get help either from your teacher or your doctor.

What were you in hospital for? You said it was something to do with the bullying, did the school know it was because of the bullying? I am surprised they have not intervened already.

Please get some help and keep posting and tell us how you are getting on. We all care about you here and want to help as much as we can.

thankyou verry much.
this is just a short post as i have to go.
i'll post later on with whats been happening.
thankyou.x