Hello Fixingme
I am sorry to hear you are feeling down and depressed. First of all I would suggest you see your primary doctor to make sure you have nothing physically going on that could be causing your symptoms. Be sure to tell the doctor exactly how you feel. Perhaps a therapist would be helpful to you.
Never lose hope in dealing with your fears and depression. Notice your feelings, figure out what's real, ask 'so what?', make it bigger than life, walk through it, and celebrate who you are.
We are here to support you so stick with us and try to take it one day at a time.
Gentle Hugs,
Kitt