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Posted 9/12/2004 10:59 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,  I've been dealing with depression and general anxiety for the past three months.  Last month I visited my doctor and got on Lexapro and some Ativan to help me sleep.  I do feel better but I'm having so much trouble going to work and doing my job.  Since most of my depression and anxiety is tied up with my job, it's a self fulfiling prophecy, i.e. I'm going to lose my job and if I keep this attitude up I will.  Can anyone suggest any strategies to help me cope?
Posted 9/13/2004 3:17 PM (GMT 0)

Hi prairierose,

Sorry you are having a bad time with the anxiety and depression.

I have been in a similar situation to you with my job earlier this year. I started with anxiety first, because the job was so stressful and I wasn't enjoying it at all. Then a close friend of mine died suddenly and so I soon became depressed. I had to take almost a month off. In that time I went to my doctor, he didn't put me on medication, as I wanted to try to get through it without if I could.

I was very depressed and it was then that I found this site, which helped me a lot. Despite having to deal with grieving for the loss my friend,  I was aware like you that it was the job that was having a big impact on me. I then decided to use the occupational health department at work, I knew it was confidential and they were brilliant with me! They also recommended that I seek counselling to help with the greiving process, which I did.

Do you have a occupational health department or someone you can speak to at work? Could you take some sick leave to think things through as I did? Do you think that you may need some sort of counselling to help you through as well as the medication?

I eventually decided that I had to get out of that environment and I became determined to get another job. When I did go back to work, (Which I was dreading) I was suprised at how supportive they were with me. I think it was due to the fact that my sick note had work related stress on it. 

You may find that work may offer you support if you are honest with them. Obviousely I don't know your circumstances, but it's worth a try.

I eventually applied for another job 3 months later and got it. I am feeling much better in myself, but still get depressed after everything that has happened. Although I feel that I'm able to cope much better than I did before. I won't say it is easy, but I am getting there and you will too.

You may feel like you can't cope, but try to stay positive, you will get through it. 

I hope this helps you a little.

Take care for now

Debbie

Posted 9/14/2004 3:08 PM (GMT 0)
Debbie,

Thank you for you kind words. I've been reading through this site and there are so many supportive people here. I felt like I was all alone in this. I'm thinking that counseling might be something that I need. I'll be seeing my doctor today and I'll talk with her about it.
Unfortunely, the environment here at work is not very supportive. My main worry is that my boss is the type of person that if I admitted my depression to would tell anyone calling for a reference that the reason I'm leaving is because I'm depressed and having mental health issues. Probably not going to help me in a job search.
However, I have a co-worker that has struggled with depression in the past so I have at least one confidential person that I can talk to.
I have started looking for another job. I know it takes a while to find one so I'm hoping to hang on until then. The other thing that I've thought of is selling my house and moving in with my mother. I've talked about this with her and she would not mind if I did. The reasoning behind this is that I could take a lower paying job and not worry about the mortage. It's a very drastic step but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. I actually lived with her when I got out of college so I know that we get along. She is also getting up there in years and having wouldn't mind having someone to help her take care of the house.

Karen
Posted 9/14/2004 6:50 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there,

I really feel for you. I was in a similar situation 6 months ago. I did quit my job, and it was the best thing that I could have done. After I left it felt like the world was off my shoulders. Don't make any decisions that you might regret. You are well ahead of the game by having your own home. Don't let that get away from you. You may not think so, but you are a very strong person for staying at that job. You will get a job that you enjoy.

JES
Posted 9/15/2004 9:01 PM (GMT 0)
Jes,

Thank you for your kind words. I'm hanging on with my fingernails though. Don't know how much
longer I can take this.

Karen
Posted 9/16/2004 12:27 AM (GMT 0)
Hi,
You will learn to gain control over your anxiety - I find journaling works well - break a page into columns and write what is currently bothering you and what anxious thoughts you are having as well as the feelings you are having. Then counter this thinking with rationlizations ie. - I am capable and good at my job, this is a temporary situation which will pas etc. I find it helps to put the lies to what quickly jumps into our minds when we are anxious. I have suffered from generalized anxiety and depression for 12 years; for the first 2 I never went for help, but I have had 10 great years on effexor and ativan. At this time I am having a flare up as my depression is acting up but I am getting help to get it back under control.
Set aside a period of time to worry about it or work on it and then set it aside and catch yourself whenever you start thinking anxious thoughts and replace them with something more positive. I am taking a course on anxiety and panic right now and would suggest you look for some community resources to help you out.
You are not alone
Hurricane
Posted 9/16/2004 8:01 PM (GMT 0)
Hurricane,

Thank you. I've actually applied for some jobs and just the act itself helped. I don't think I was very qualified for two of them but it got me thinking about getting a resume together, etc. I'm on Lexapro and I've heard good things about effexor. I'm cautious about asking my doctor about changing meds. Does anyone know if you have to go off one before you start the other? I know I should get some counseling too, I've actually gotten a phone number to call to check on therapists. I keep trying to tell myself that this will pass, this will pass.

Karen
Posted 10/8/2004 8:10 PM (GMT 0)

Everyone,

I haven't posted in a while.  I saw a therapist this week (Oct. 5) and all my nervousness about seeing her were unfounded. She's great.  I can't wait for my next session.  I've done some journaling on my own and it's lead to some insights.  Also, Thank Goodness, I think the depression has lifted.  Which just really baffles me.  One day I'm still totally depressed and crying and the next day it's lifted and I feel myself again.  Does it turn on and off like this???  It's just bewildering.  Maybe the lexapro took longer to work (I started it August 12)???  How can depression just hit you and then leave????  Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that it's gone, but completely gobsmacked. 

Maybe one of the things that helped is that I've decided that I want to go to nursing school.  I have most of my prereq's done and already have a BS so I just need the two years of nursing school.  Funding the schooling will be the tricky part.  Anyone have any suggestions??  There's also a job that might come open here at work in January that would be something new and exciting, and it pays about the same as my current one.  Since you apply for nursing school a year in advance and I need to figure out financing this could be a good job until I start school.

Sorry to ramble on but I really felt the need to post.

karen

Posted 10/9/2004 7:22 AM (GMT 0)

Hi prairierose,

So nice to hear from you and so good to know you are feeling a lot better. I am also glad that you are looking forward to your next therapy session. 

You mentioned how your depression comes and goes, well I was very similar to you, mine would come and go too. I still have my off days where I can feel very down, but I try to keep myself busy. I have even recently joined a gym and it is true what they say about excercise, it is helping me a lot i.e. in both body and mind.

You mention about funding for nursing school, well that is a tricky one. Here in England we are paid a bursary £550.00 a month to do the diploma in nursing, so it is easier to do the training here, although sometimes we would still find it hard and have to do some part time work as well. Do you not have anything like a bursary? Apart from working part time to help out, I can't really think of anything else and you don't really want to be taking out loans to fund it. Maybe someone else can come up with some ideas. You obviousely really want to do your nurse training, so don't give up something will turn up. 

I really do hope everything turns out for you, keep in touch and let us know how you are getting on.

Take care for now

Debbie

Posted 2/21/2005 5:09 PM (GMT 0)
Haven't posted here for a while.  Things are pretty much on a downward spiral.  I'm still in this crappy job and have crying jags every day before I come to work.  I've applied for two other jobs but I doubt I'll get either of them.  One of the jobs is very competitive, but pays less.  The other job is very stressful, but pays more.  I think my whole depression is tied up with this job.  I absoutely hate going to work.  But I can't pinpoint why.  I've switched from lexapro to wellbutrin and I'm not so tired but still depressed.  I'm seeing a therapist but I don't think it's helping any.  I'm journaling and using my journal to help me keep lists.

Posted 2/22/2005 7:53 AM (GMT 0)
prairierose,

god be with you, if things aren't going that well in your work why not take a long vacation? relax in it and spend time looking for a job. maybe even an un-paied vacation. efexor is pretty good and it's a relativly new drug. i think you might need some mood-stabilizer as well talk to your doctor about serquel and zeldox.

your crying sprees are worrying, make sure you have someone in your life like a close friend who can help when your feeling like that you should not be alone. there is no medicine like a good friend who can understand you and just give you support. spend as little time as possible alone, that works for me.
Posted 2/22/2005 8:09 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Karen,

Sorry things are still not right with your job. Hopefully something will turn up for you soon.
It does seem like most of your depression is caused by your job, it's good to keep a journal and it can help with your feelings.
I just wanted to ask you, are you still thinking of doing the nurse training, or would it be too difficult with money etc?
Keep us posted, wishing you all the best.

Debbie
Posted 2/22/2005 7:47 PM (GMT 0)

Can't tell you how good it feels to have your reply's.  I have some good friends but they don't seem to understand my depression.  I've been putting on a happy face for them because I think they're tired of listening to me whine.  I've even convinced my therapist that I'm doing better.  I have a therapy session this afternoon and I think I need to come clean to her.  I think I've done that all my life---try to please everyone by being the person that they want me to be.  I don't want to come clean to my boyfriend because he's under a lot of pressure at his job and I don't want to stress him out.  

I'm taking a CNA (certified nurses aide) class right now, but I can't figure out how to pay for nursing school for two years.  I'm also taking an accounting class and I think that might be more doable then nursing because I can do it part-time.  I have applied for another job but they won't be interviewing until the middle of March and won't be hiring until the first part of April (state job, so moves as slow as molasses).  It's just surviving until I hear about this job.  I really want it because it's in the same office I'm in right now and I like this office, it's just the job that's getting to me.

I'll ask my therapist about the effexor, serquel and zeldox.  I'm so fustrated because I'm doing everything I'm supposed to do but I'm not getting any better.  Yeah, I'm worried about myself.  Feels like I'm screaming for help inside but can't get anyone to listen.

Posted 12/20/2012 1:07 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bellaj78,

This is a very old thread. In fact it is seven years old. So I don't really think you are going to get any responses from the people who started it, though I could be wrong.

I am sorry for your situation. I hope that it gets better. How bad is your hearing loss? I hope you get to a good doctor soon. Keep posting. You might want to start a new thread, you would get more responses that way.

Hugs, Karen
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