when will it all go away

I have been suffering from depression since i was 13. Life has always been a roller coaster for me. the past 3 years have been horrible to say the least! every time i think things are getting better they just keep getting worst. I feel like im a horrible person. I try so hard to be happy i really do.  I always have a fake smile plastered on my face if you met me you woluld have no clue i carry all the secrets i do. I honestly feel like things just keep getting worst and worst and i feel like im slowly giving up. i want help but i dont even know where to get it. If i could even afford it. no one understands. and when i try to talk to my parents they never take me seriously. my mom thinks that im being over dramatic when i try to explain how i really feel. and when it comes to my dad he just ignores it cause he doesnt want to beleive it. i feel like im never going to be really happy again i dont even know what real happiness is anymore. I just want to know when will it all just go away.

I'm right there with you lovekenz ... Feeling similar pain and dealing with many secrets too... Wondering who I can trust enough to reveal them to. Just want someone to listen and give me some good advice without judging me for once. You're not being dramatic. You just want to be heard w/ out being judged. You want someone to finally care about what is important to you.

Standing in the background waiting for that someone to finally hear me....

Heartaches N Lost

Getting by, i used to be on medacine for it but my dr quit prescribing it because she wanted me to see a pshychiatrist but we couldnt afford that so i was just going to have to start to deal with it on my own with no help. when all that happend we lost our house to foreclosure and had a week to get everything out of it and after that happend things just kept happening and still are.


Heartaches N Lost, im sorry you are going through all of this. THe pain i feel everyday of my life is a pain i wouldnt even wish onto my worst enemy. It feels like its never going to get better. and everytime i meeet someone that i feel i can open up to and talk to they just walk out of my life as soon as i open up just a little and its made me trust no one and almost afraid of other people because i feel like as soon as i let them even know a little about how i really feel or even open up a little about my past there going to walk out of my life cause it just keeps happening.