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Posted 8/5/2011 3:24 PM (GMT 0)
Hello, I am 26 years old and I have been dealing with a very volatile relationship for the past year and a half and it's finally taking a toll on my well being. The worst thing that has happened is that a couple of weeks ago I got arrested for domestic assault because I bit my partner on the hand and he went to the police station because I took his phone away from him. I don't know what's wrong with me! It's so embarassing and awful and I feel completely out of control when I am dealing with this person. He has hit me in the past before (a shove here and there, a full punch to my side once) and we have been trying to work on this relationship but it feels like I don't know what else to do anymore. We scheduled a counseling session for the 15th of this month in order to seek professional help but I don't know if I can live this way until then, I mean it's only 10 days away! I feel like this person does not like me at all anymore and doesn't love me anymore, I feel like I am trying my hardest and I'm just being disappointed and crushed and it is just really messing with me, I don't even feel normal anymore, I can't enjoy things in life becasue I am so consumed obsessing over this relationship. Is there any hope for us? Is there anything I can do to save my relationship and keep my sanity?
Posted 8/5/2011 3:44 PM (GMT 0)
Try to hang in there until your appointment, if you can. I don't know if you are in a safe environment with him. Is there anywhere you can go until the appointment? It sounds like you are toxic to eachother.

I don't like hearing that he has hit you and been physically violent. You don't deserve this treatment. I don't know why you stay. But it sounds like you both can get violent, ie you biting him. Or were you defending yourself. If that was the case, you should have let the police know that. It sounds like he brings out the worst in you.

Are you two by any chance drinking alcohol? That can lead to these types of encounters. If so, please discuss this with the counselor. Be open and honest and tell everything that is going on. I would like to see you leave this person for the time being. I just don't know if it is possible for you or not. But you do need to learn that you don't deserve to be hit or shoved around by him. Nobody deserves that.

Keep us posted on what is going on.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 8/5/2011 9:43 PM (GMT 0)
We have not been consuming alcohol when the events have happened which makes it even worse in my opinion, and I don't know if things will change, this therapy is kind if like our last ditch effort but I feel so out of my mind with stress that it seems to consume my entire life
Posted 8/5/2011 10:48 PM (GMT 0)
I wonder if there is something that you can do to preoccupy your mind. Do you do meditation at all? It makes you very aware of everything around you and helps you to focus on the present situation instead of dwelling on things over and over. If that is what you are doing. Try to stay in the "now". Try not to think about things unti the time comes up. This takes practice but it can be done.

I still worry about wherher or not you should bet out of that house before something terrible happens. What about a woman's shelter? Or a mission, or church? I am worried about your welfare. Emotional and physical.

Keep posting and let us know how ytou are doing.

Hugs, Karen
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