Angry in writing

Hi All,

I'm not sure what this post will be about or how it will turn out - I'm just rather bored since nothing seems to keep me asleep.

So far today, 5mg of Klonopin and 200mg of Benedryl (I don't have allergies or a cold). I will probably take a few more around 2200hours in the hopes sleep will come again. It is nice that both pills are pink - I'd hate to mix medication that is not colour-coordinated.

Here comes the ranting part of me...Things I hate when I am depressed to the point of S.I. (if you don't understand the acronym, I'm afraid this site will probably not allow me to explain it to you).

1. People telling me it will get better

2. People telling me that they are there for me, but I have to call them

3. Positive/optimistic platitudes

4. That CBT is some magical therapy that can help me cope and make it all better (I've tried it for 10 years...guess what)

5. Knowing I am completely alone in this; I'm not suggesting others are not suffering too but rather that no one can actually say or do anything to make it all better. Is up to me...But I have neither the energy and I just don't care anymore.

6. Being told to take care of myself...

7. Not being able to get any timely aid due to red tape

8. Being inundated by phone calls by family and friends to make sure I'm okay (that number presently stands at zero)

9. Being told to exercise. Really? I know it works, but that would require getting up and I have no inclination to do that any longer (easier when you drink minimally and eat once a day).

10. Over-paid and ultimately useless therapists

Feel free to add the the list...I can't help but be intrigued by what other major depressives are annoyed (not the potent word I'd like to use, but whatever).

Going off Cymbalta cold turkey is going well, thanks for asking. Just constant brain zaps...Better than a full-fledged panic attack.

Regards,

DarkWolf

P.S. Sorry for any typos, grammatical errors and misspelled words, but I don't have (or simply don't care) to read this over.

Being told to "just get over it" has always been a huge peeve of mine. It's so insensitive!

...or "don't think negative thoughts." Lol, if it were that easy no one would ever be depressed :)

I hope this was cathartic for you, as jamiee suggested. Sometimes we need a safe place to get stuff like that off our chests.

DW, I hope you do come back and post, now I am worried.

My pet peeve is not being understood. But I create that too as I never let anyone in to see all the muck (except for one friend)

Dark Wolf

I love your posts, so DARKLY funny and real...please don't stop, I promise you I will not sling platitudes at you.

I hate that look on their faces when they say crooningly like I'm a baby" so , How are you doing?"

Huhsband:
'If you'd get off your fat a** and do something, you'd feel better" Now there's some loving motivation.

Therapist
"Let's try this new medication..it's had good results" Yeah, the 18 ects I went thru were supposed to do that...what's next a frontal lobotomy????

and the winner is )as you said) "Make sure you call me if you need ANYTHING" First, I'm not going to cal because i am DEPRESSED and second, what could you possibly bring me, a tuna casserole? LOL

I tend to stay more angry with depression than morose and crying-I am really pi88ed lately, fed up

Please don't leave us DW, we need your caustic comments-getting over depression is not about finding unicorns and ***ter and mindless thoughtless grinning idioys...it is about hurting angry hurting people who are walking thru a nightmare, lost trying to just get out of the weeds...thanks for the post-I needed that

Maggie

Hey DW

I just got off cymbalta cold turkey too--it wasn't bad for me. Actually, I think I am thinking clearer (and angrier) than I have in a long time. I have cried twice in 3 weeks, mainly frustration at not being able to work anymore and why did God give me this great brain if I'm gonna sit here and fall into a persistent vegetative state?

Anyway, just wanted to let you know you have comapny in your sinking ship-lol

Come back
Maggie

Dw,
In case you read this, I wanted to check on you. Please know that we care and hope you'll keep posting.

Hi Connie,
I might have? I saw it under someone's name and have always liked Lewis Carroll. I think it pertains to most of us here lol.
If you'd prefer, I could change it.