Terrified to talk

In my school, no one talks about death. It's like a forbidden topic. Only problem is, is that my best friend died last year. She was the only one who talked to me. I miss her so much. She died in a car accident and I have never spent a day without crying. My new friends don't talk about her and I feel so alone. My guidance cow skier wont tell me if I'm depressed or not because I haven't gone to her. Please help me !!!!!!

You have my condolences and sincere sympathies for the loss of your friends. I truly understand how these tragic events can make your head, emotions, etc spin. Back when I was in high school, my freshman year in fact, one of my friends accidentally shot himself and then they year after I graduated my fiance was killed in a drunk driving accident.

While I can understand your wanting to talk about what has happened with your classmates please do not be too hard on them for avoiding the subject. Having someone die at any age is hard enough to deal with for anyone regardless of their age, but when it is a young person that has passed away and it is also young people trying to deal with it this is a double blow.

Most young people, while they know intellectually that they are not immortal, have this sense of immortality. For the most part, to them, death is something that happens when you get very old, and when you are in your teens or twenties this seems like several lifetimes away, but when someone their own age dies it injects a little bit of "reality" into their world and for many this is not something they want to really think about.

Everyone has their own way with dealing with things.

Now that we have talked about your classmates let's talk a moment about you. You need to get all of these feelings that you are holding inside out. You need to grieve and talk about it and heal and you have made it clear that by not being able to do it you are sinking into depression which is quite understandable.

I urge you to talk to either your school guidance counselor, school nurse or someone at your local mental health clinic, or your parents and get some help. Taking that first step or two is not easy, and it is often the hardest part but after that the next steps come a little easier.

My deepest condolences to you too. I feel you need grief counsseling hon. Talk to your guidance counselor, they are there to help you through this. If you don't talk, you will just feel worse. I am glad that you opened up here. We can help you some, but not like a counselor could.

Keep posting and know that everybody cares about you.

Hugs, Karen

Many many sympathies to you...
First tell your parents, that your having a hard time dealing with your best friends death,
they need to know so that they can help you get help...and they would want to know your hurting
so bad from this, death is never easy and it is hard to live thru this...
I had to go on after the death of my cousins, when I was young and it is still hard to talk about,
So seek out help from your school counselors and from your parents and then only time can
help with the rest of you to heal, but you will have many many new friends and things to look forward to
and that this grief will not always hurt so bad, even though it feels like that now...you have so much to go on
and live for.....

Im so sorry for ur loss! My words cant be much help to u! but ur brave enough to take it out here! Keep writing about how u feel! we are the friends u need to talk to! Just let it all out! we are here to listen to u! I hope and pray that u feel better soon! Best of luck!! <3 lots of love!!

Yeah... I don't go to church bcd I am banned because of previous actions in which the priest decided I should not go... I was crying when ever they talked about any type of father or friend... I do go to private meetings but I can't go with other people. It doesn't help that my guidance counselor is dealing with my other friend who is very blumic and also depressed. She attempted suicide but my friend managed to take her "pills to help her" away. They werent hers and she was goi g to kill herself. And now I'm crying again. Ok need to get meds bcd don't have any yet. Still haven't met with my guidance counselor this week. Actually, won't met u til next week. 2 weeks is a bad break for me. Even one week is bad.

Thanks so much you guys, I feel so much more relaxed but still depressed.

You guys are so caring and kind to me, more than the kids at my school

Private school and thanks. See, the school is for kids who have a condition such as depression, anorexia, ect. So that may be why but I suppose I just really need to talk it out. I am scared to go to my counselor for help bcd she will just put me on more meds but yeah, I suppose I should tell her, non?

Thanks so much...

Drrodrick-
Hello darling.
I know what its like to lose a friend. In '07 my best friend died of a heroin overdose. I felt like i knew him better than anyone yet anytime i brought him up they became reluctant to continue talking about him. Almost as if the pain of knowing a friend who died was too much to bear than remembering what good he brought in our lives.
This made me VERY angry because i felt people were so selfish about it. As if they were using my best friends death as a reason to get attention. BUT thats also selfish of me to feel like someone who knew him for a week didnt love him as well..
This boy, Kyle, was my world.
I talk about Kyle ALL the time to this day. I have accepted what has happened but he lives on through my talking of him and the good memories, the hilarious stories i have about him, and the artwork he has made for me.
Talking about those who we love that have passed only keeps us closer. If someone doesnt want to hear or think of your loved one then maybe they need more time. The less your loved one is brought to life through stories and memories the sooner they are gone.
I often write to Kyle in my journal and he has visited me in my dreams. Never stop remembering them and you will feel their love! If your friends arent talking about it maybe ask them if its ok to talk about it even if its just once. If you still feel alone about it talk to your (i like to call, "new guardian angels") make it a connection between you and your late loved ones! Never feel like they are gone forever because they are with you in spirit (as long as you keep them close to your heart!)

i wish you the best with love!!!

Thanks do much appeal... That really helped. I looked at this before I went to my counsler and this really touched me about how you told me about your friend. I am so sorry for your loss and I know that sounds dumb but he seems like e would be one of my friends if he was in my school. Oh and chatatoux, my mom is feelin better but she still isn't right as you very well know