Posted 6/13/2012 9:30 PM (GMT 0)
I am reaching out for help as I believe that my wife of seven years is suffering from some form of depression. Many of her friends and family have raised their concerns about her weight loss over the past six months.
At first I thought she had an eating disorder but in the past few months I have read a lot about depression and strongly believe that she has some form of the illness. Besides the eating disorder there are mny things she has done that are out of character,
- increased alcohol consumption
- easily frustrated with our young child, grabs her in frustration or just tells her to go away.
- has been going out to pubs and clubs, on occasions until very late in the morning.
- excessive shopping, has purchased a lot of clothing shoes etc that she doesn't need
- gets angry and lashes out screaming in frustration
- issues sleeping, always tired
- no intimacy and no motivation sexually
- I can see that a lot of these and other little things she is doing is to make herself feel better about herself.
I did confront her originally about her eating issues and she laughed it off as a joke. In the past few weeks after she spent a big night out with a friend, until 4.30am, I lashed out and confronted her about what I believe she is suffering from - depression. She also denied that there was anything wrong with her and laughed off my diagnosis. A few days ago she told me that she was going to see our doctor - I don't think has happened yet and one of her fiends told me it was to see if she was going through menopause and to get some sleeping tablets.
I just see that she is hurting inside and i think she is scared of what is happening to herself and us. As of last night she left with our daughter before I returned from work without telling me where she was going. Fortunately I spoke to one of her friends who told me she was going over to her place ( the same friend she has been going out at night with). She also texted me and said 'sorry going to friends place'
Two nights ago I told her that i had spoken to her mother and one of her other friends about my concerns that i had, she lashed out in anger and this is why I believe she left last night.
I don't know what to do next? I know there is a history of mental illness in her family and that she needs to go and get help but I feel if I keep pushing her she will leave me. I am more concerned about how this would affect our child than what it will do to me as I can look after myself and I have a good family support group around me.
Her mother has told me that she has done this a few times in the past and she knows now that she is suffering from some form of depression. She suggested that we get her father involved as he was her rock last time she went through this, I also want to get one of her other close friends involved that she helped get to go see someone about her anxiety / depression issues (who is on medication and is a different person). I am not sure if this would work or if I should get a group of her close family and friends together and do some type of intervention with her, again not sure if this will push her away from everyone?
Anyone with ideas or suggestions that could help would be appreciated.