60+? Depressed?

Hi Katya86...

We do try to appreciate the good we have, even if it is just a little bit, because that should be recognized to humble us. So we do count our blessings here. So you may hear that from time to time. There are always others that are worse off than we are.

I think you have found your tribe here, but only you can determine that. But there are many depressed members here who understand what you are going through. We are all a work in progress, just at different stages.

We all have problems. No one of us is above that. So we do know how you feel. Life is tough, and being depressed makes it even tougher, but you don't need me to tell you that.

I sure do hope that you feel better soon. Keep posting and know we all care about you.

Hugs, Karen...

PS Welcome to the forum!!!

What do you mean that you want to "dive into the darkness"? We have all suffered in different ways. We are trying to get better, so I don't know if what you want to do would be constructive for a lot of the members here. I guess we will have to see. I don't want to turn anybody away. So I try to keep an open mind.

Let's see what you mean and proceed from there...

I reread your fist post.  If you mean poetry, we are all up for that...

Hugs, Karen

I do not equate diving into the darkness with wallowing in self pity. I am very glad that "pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again" works for the people on this site. Good bye and good luck.

I'm also a retired Senior dealing with depression.  I'm new to depression but doing better today than when it began in January.  Like yourself, I've also lost interest in just about everything but I have some hope this will change.  I did a search and found that 6.5 Million of 35 Million Americans 65+ are depressed which is almost 1 in 5.   I was surprised by these figures thinking it was higher. Depression in Seniors is often ignored because many think that depression is a normal part of aging.

Where we differ is that I do count my blessings.  I'm financially well off, have a nice home and other than the depression I'm in very good health.  Million of Americans far worst off than me.  I know this is not what you want to hear but it's what keeps me going and keeps me from feeling sorry for myself. 

With 6.5 Million Seniors with Depression in the USA, it's unfortuante that we don't have an online community forum for Depressed Seniors. 

 

Michael, I never said that I don't count my blessings; I have a number of them, and I'm aware that my depression-problems would be classified by many as "First World Problems." In fact, the comedian Louis C.K. has a very funny riff on how angry Americans are by the very wonders we have in our world. I'm happy to hear that people count their blessings; you said nothing I didn't want to hear; I just don't want anyone to *tell* me to do so, as if that will make it all better. For me, that's wasting time. Relatively speaking, I'm lucky. I know that. I just want to figure out how I can get better and use what I have. I know readers can not believe that I don't feel sorry for myself. Perhaps I should mention I've lost my best-friend sister to Alzheimer's and my long-time love to leukemia. I miss these people, and if that's feeling sorry for myself, very well then, I am loser sopping in self-pity,

It occurs to me (see I can think of others) that your depression might be related to retirement. Even when people plan ahead for this symptom, it can still take one unawares. I was very happy to retire, but was shocked to discover that I felt a loss of identity; I wasn't expecting that. Even though the research I did as a university employee still was viable, it didn't seem necessary anymore.

One of the most difficult things to know is what one wants to do. If you can consider that as honestly as possible and listen to the answer your mind brings forth, you might have a way to begin moving through the 60+ Age of Depression.

Katy wonderful you posted back again!

Since we disclosing I am 51 and yes amount the unemployed for the last year due to my list of "friends" [see my diagnosis under signature]

I worked with seniors for 20+ years and I have to put it out there, depression does no have to be. Even in a nursing home enivronment I have some some amazing people that love life and taught me some lessons that are helping me through my struggles today.

I truly sense some anger in your post and would like you to continue to vent here with us. We are here to listen, support and not judge.

We just see that the good days can out number the bad. Depression is an illness that can be treated and dealt with, like any other life long ailament.

Stay Strong Katy and keep posting we love to hear from you, and anyone that gets Michael posting as to have something special going on!


Trina

Hope, I think my reply to you was lost; forgive me if this is a redundancy. I want to thank you for your post; it was understanding and gentle. I particularly appreciated:"I just want what I am feeling to be honored." I thought I was going to give up on this site, but your generosity toward me and toward "the folks here" with their "worlds of wisdom and compassion" has given me pause. I realize that I am a little "prickly" these days or as my late dad would put it, "owly." Sometimes one gets so tired of it all.
Anyway, you say that you don't post often; but I'd like to know more about you and how you deal with depression in the 60s. In this day and age that isn't such a great age; I expected to be much more active and productive than I am, but I did get hit with some pesky health problems and the beginning attrition of those near-and-dear to me affected me more than I expected.
I am trying hard to do the right things, but sometimes one gets so tired; I am trying to find new interests to engage me. But enough!
Thank you for your post.
All best,
Katya

Hi Katya - Thank you for your kind reply; I am glad that what I offered resonated with you.

I have been retired for about a year or so. A lot of things came together that "encouraged" my retirement then. Like Karen, I have fibromyalgia also, and my job was just too physically demanding. You mentioned health issues too. I wonder if they are contributing to your mood. I have found that , even though I have had fibro for 40 years or so, now I have to be much more mindful of how I feel and what I am doing, (and how I am doing it). My entire life I have "pushed through", and let me tell you, it just doesn't work for me at 60. Or if I do, I am down for a long time. You mentioned that you thought you would be "more productive" at this age. I know the feeling, but maybe it is time for a new perspective at our age. Looking at our activity or outward expression of ourselves differently. Just trying to get around this idea myself, so it is not very clear, I am sure. And we do get tired, dealing with depression throughout our lives. I hope that you have a counselor or trusted friend to talk with.

I will be looking forward to hearing more from you.

Hope

This is a reply to Hope. I have read a few of your other posts and you seem to keep quite active despite your fibromyalgia. Are you still volunteering and tutoring? That's quite impressive. How do you manage your fibromyalgia? Nebulous diseases like that seem to get the usual: be sure to exercise, keep mentally agile and have a social network. Do you find that your diet is getting more and more bland? Food used to give me pleasure, but now it seems like if it's not white, I can't handle it! Do you have friends that you can really talk to?

I do have a psychiatrist, but we mostly discuss my symptoms and my medications. I have a therapist whom I see from time to time. I believe she's quite good, but lately I haven't wanted to talk to her. I think it may be because of our differing opinions on Alzheimer's patients. Yes, that's one more thing. My beloved sister, great friend and confidante is now in an assisted living facility 1000 miles away. I suppose one would say she's doing well; but she was the clever one of the family. . . Anyway, my therapist (who also has Alzheimer's in her family) believes that even as one's mind disintegrates, one can adjust and find a peace and happiness in whatever state one's in. Although my sister puts up a great front, when I manage to visit her she will tell me how difficult it is, but that she knows she has no choice so she just deals with it. I have heard relatives of Alzheimer's patients describe them as "happy as clams." My sister's son and daughter-in-law think that of my sister; denial is a powerful drug.

Oh dear, I seem to have gotten off on another negative streak. Yes, losing my best friend and sister certainly is another contributor to my depression. Writing here helps so I guess I will continue to post. Coming up: my gentleman friend who has one of those alphabet diseases that used to be called "pre-leukemia."

I wasn't ready for all of this. That's beside the point. It's happening, and I must deal with it. I'm trying to find a better way than watching television, coming to this forum and going on Facebook with the occasional e-mail connection. All of this is a start I tell myself. And I suppose it's better than just shutting down completely.

Sorry Hope, I wanted to write a clear missive to you, but things keep interfering.
Katya

Hope,

I feel for you with the fibromyalgia. I suffer too and it is hard. I hope that you have a good day and thank you for posting.

Hugs, Karen

You are so welcome. As a matter of fact, it is you all that keep me going...

Hugs...