Being pushed too far

Hi guys,

Its been a long time since I have been here.  However at the moment I feel I am on the edge.

As some of you know, I manage an apartment complex.  The first several years I have been there everything was fine between me and the owners.  The past couple, not so much.  I am the only actual employee.  It isn't a large complex.  However, right now I am feeling backed into a corner.  Just a brief history.  I have always done what I could to please the owners.  That is just my personality.  The past couple of years I volunteerly took care of one of my bosses mom.  I have become very attached to her.  She is 99.  I did errands for my boss.  As a person, I like my boss.  We got along great.

In October I had rotator cuff surgery.  I had two large tears.  I am now going to start going for physical therapy.  I would have started it a little earlier, but the week before Thanksgiving I was coming from my apartment to the office.  I missed the last step or two.  I have fallen before and I get up and brush myself off and go on.  For some reason this time it did not hurt but felt different.  I called out for help.  The tenant below me came running.  He took one look and said he was going for his phone to call 911 and said I had broken my ankle.  I did not believe him.  After they got me to the hospital and took off my sock, I could tell it was broken.  I had surgery the following day and had pins and plates put in,  I went home 2 days later.  Since I could not do any weight bearing on my ankle or shoulder I am in a wheel chair.  I go back to the surgeon on the 18th.  I am hoping to be able to put a little bit of weight on my foot.  I hope in another week or two I can go to using crutches or a walker since right now I can't do that now due to my shoulder but after a couple of weeks of therapy I hope I can.  I told my boss that I hoped to return to work on the 24th, but nothing was etched in stone.  Well, apparently she thinks I am returning on the 24th at full strength, being able to use the stairs.  Not going to happen.  Well, I am doing what I can do at home for work.  Well, she is now expecting me to do all this stuff at home, including doing the weekly agenda, which in my opinion, along with my friends, she is taking it to the extremes.  It took me forever to "get it right" in her opinion.  I have someone filling in for me and even that person thinks my boss is crazy.  Noone I have talked to understands how she can even expect me to be at full strength 5 weeks after 2 major surgeries.  I have not even started PT on my foot.  I cannot understand why she has no clue whatsoever.  It seems after every e-mail I end up in tears.  Sometimes I loose it.   I try to write friendly e-mails to her but they always come  back tearing me down about not getting all my work she expects me to do done right of way.  Everyone says I need to concentrate on my healing.  I do not mind doing what work I can.  I have even been out to the office 3 x now but they do not know it because they would expect me to go back to work.  I am going back before I really should. I figure that as long as I am sitting in the office at the desk will be ok, but she expects me to show the apartments which is on the 2nd floor and says she does not know what I plan to do since I cannot show the apt. ect.  Another example of their inconsideration was that the day I fell, I had parked in front of the office.  We don't allow tenants to do that during business hours.  Well, the following Tue., 2 days after returning home, or rather to my dad's since my apt. is on the 3rd floor, my other boss called me and jumped all over me.  He asked if I knew my car was in front of the office and I said yes, and he told me he wanted me to have it moved immediatley.  I explained my sister and best friend were going out there that afternoon to move it and he demanded to know what time (he was not even going to be anywhere near there), so after I talked to him, I hung up crying and called my best friend and she and her daughter-in-law went out and got my car.  I found it extremely rude the way he treated me but that is how he treats everyone.

I am doing the best I can under difficult circumstances but she is relentless.  I have been in fear of losing my job for a while because I am not too organized, I have ADHD pretty bad, only work 6 hours per day M-F and 3 on Sat. and alot of times am constantly being interupted by people coming in or calling.  I have been thinking of ways to be better organized and have bought something I believe will help me as do my friends.

I can't up and quit because I need the insurance for my therapy.  I love my tenants and basically love my job but it is becoming unbearable.  If they would leave me alone for the most part things would be fine.  Even our maintenance guy has told me not to worry about my job and just rest.  I tell him if I don't I will not get paid.  We do not have work comp because it is not required for under 5 employee's and no disability.  If I would quit I would lose my insurance and would not be able to collect unemployment unless there is a way to be able to quit under extreme stress and collect unemployment.  I know she would never treat anyone else this way.  I am a way to easy person because I want to please people, do for others and very easy to push around.  I feel I have to walk on egg shells in order not to get fired.

I apologize this is long but I had plenty to get off my chest.  I need any and all suggestions on how to cope.  My therapist says she does not believe they will fire me and that they are bullying me.  I am not one to cause conflict or stand up to people.  I need help.

You can apply for a medical leave of absence. Legally they can not fire you.

Also, if you are not strong enough to talk one on one with you boss to tell them your current limitation, ask your doctor to give you a out of work letter or work limitation letter; see if the doctor will call your boss for you. Some will.

You have rights as an employee, these people are taking advantage of your good nature and you are being bulldozed. Make it stop now, before it effects your health.

Stay out of the office! You should be on medical leave.

Wishing you strength to stand against them.
Trina

Thanks guys for all your advice.  I don't know if they have medical leave.  I do not want to go into the office  but I do to do some things I got behind on because of my 2 medical issues.  My friend took some leases over to my bosses house and my boss said something about they were looking for a management co.  How serious they are, I do not know.  If they go with a management co. would that mean I am out of a job or would I be able to stay and work for them?

One of my bosses called me today and asked how my foot was. I told him I go to the dr. next Tue. and I am still not weight bearing but hoped to be a little bit after my next appt.  I told him I would still have to do therapy on the foot and he said that had nothing to do with me being able to do stairs.  These people are not stupid.  I just do not understand why they do not understand why I have to be released by a dr.   He told me once that the dr. had nothing to do with when I came back. 

I did go out to the office on Wed. and did some work I was behind on because of me being out so much plus, I am the only one there working 6 hours a day M-F and 3 hours on Sat.  I get interrupted often.  My desk is usually a mess and that bothers them, but then it bothers me too.  One of the things I am behind on is the exit inspections.  I start them but get interruped and then I have to give the paperwork to the maintenance guy.  He says he fills it out and gives it back to me.  He may give some of them back, and I think sometimes he thinks he does.  I may have lost it on my desk but I try to put it with the file.  I have text him telling him I need the paperwork.  Most of the apts. already have new tenants.   I understand him being upset over my requests but I have to have them.  My boss is on my back.  I went out and bought a plastic storage deal with like 4 or 5 drawers.  I plan to mark each drawer.  One would be like entry and exit inspections.  Then when I write them up and give the maintenance guy the paperwork, I will put it in a marked folder.  That way when he gives it back to me it will be in a folder and if I can't get to it right of way, it will go in the drawer marked Exit Inspections.  I will have a drawer marked leases that need to be signed.  When we approve a tenant, I am immediatly going to enter that person in the system, put all their paperwork in their folder in the file cabinet and do up their lease  and put in the drawer marked Leases so when they come in all they have to do is fill out the lease and any other paperwork they need to fill out.  The leases will then be put in a folder after I have signed them and take then to my boss to sign and then they will go directly into their file which will already be in the cabinet.  I never want to go thru this again so I have to work hard on making things more organized.  I get tired of a messy desk (due to ADHD, I am not organized).

I think this will help me stay a little more organized.  I love my job and I do like my boss (her)as a person.  She has just become unbearable to work for.  I think if I work harder at the job and focusing, things will get better.  I want to do the exit inspections as soon as the tenant is out and get them done and to my other boss for processing.

I just do not understand why they are acting the way they are about my injuries.  I have the complex nearly full.  I think we have 3 vacanciesss, 2 which are tied up in a legal situation and one that has to have things replaced such as cabinet doors.  Most of my friends say I am not ready to go back to work.  I feel the need to because it is a one person office and if I am not there and the other gal can not work, we are in trouble.  And I really think it is not a good idea for your boss to come out and do your job.  I know she will find something wrong.  However they are both professionals so you would think they would realize I can't do what they want right off the bat.

Someone suggested that I work for a management co.  I think I would be better in an office with more than just me.  I have excellent people skills.  However whether or not I wanted to look, I could not do it til I am healed from my ankle injury.

If anyone has any ideas on how to stand up to my boss and make them understand my medical problem is out of their hands and become more organized?

Thank!

Lexi

Perhaps you should take this time off to also address your ADHD.

the stress from you posting is overwhelming at times, you need to give yourself a break!

I cannot help be think that this is that best thing that could happen to you, forcing you to make a hard, but positive change in your life. From the outside, it is obvious that this is not the job for you. Working for a management company, in a task oriented job may be a better fit.

If you receive a W2 at the end of the year, you can apply for medical leave with that company. They have the right to replace you after 12 weeks, but they can not fire you for those 3 months. Look up FMLA on the net for more details.

Stay strong! Things happen for a reason.

Trina

Something you need to do as soon as possible is get your doctor to write you a letter outlining your health issues, work limitations, etc and then at each visit get an updated letter reporting on your current progress, limitations, etc. Make a copy of these letters and give the copy to your boss and keep the original for yourself. This will protect you should your boss try to fire you or if they end up hiring a management company and you are not kept on and need to draw unemployment and the company you are working for attempts to block it by saying you quit.

Regardless of the size of the company you work for you have certain rights under both federal and state law. You can find those rights online or you can call your local department of employment and talk to them.