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Help..My wife suffers from depression. She wont get help. She wants to leave.

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Depression
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Posted 5/6/2013 9:08 PM (GMT 0)
You are in no way responsible for her depression. She owns that. We all do. When people get depressed, it is something that just happens within us. There could be things that contribute to it, ie being in an unhappy marriage, or not being able to handle the kids, but the depression is generally a chemical imbalance (unless it is situational) and is there regardless. But who is to say, does the depression cause the unhappiness, or does the unhappiness cause the depression, or are they one in the same? Just don't get down on yourself over this.

I am wondering if you need counseling to help you through this. I would definitely get some for the kids, just to make sure that they aren't blaming themselves for anything. It is hard for children when a family splits up. I feel badly for them.

I hope that things get better. Take it one day at a time..... Mindfulness will help you right now.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 5/7/2013 1:38 AM (GMT 0)
I agree with JB and Getting BY.

Peace
Trina
Posted 5/8/2013 1:20 PM (GMT 0)
First and foremost I would like to say thank you, to all of you who have been posting your advice on my question, situation.

Without getting to religious I would like to say that I have picked up the bible and have been reading every night and praying twice a day for strenght and wisdom. I dont know but sinvce I have been doing this I have felt alot better and have found new energy and hope. I dont know if im right or wrong for what I am about to say and do but, I have decided that no matter what I am going to stay in the fight for my wife and my family. I am going to do and take whatever I have to to win this fight against the demon who is occupying space in my wifes heart. This demon will not win. It will not take my wife or family away from me. No matter what it takes I WILL WIN THIS FIGHT. I love my wife and children to much not to try any and everything.

I just want everyone to know that I am very grateful for you guys. You guys have opened my eyes and have giving me ideas and different directions to look. For that I am very grateful. I will do my best to keep posting the progress.

For now thank you all and god bless each and everyone of you.
Love will conquer all......
Posted 5/8/2013 2:10 PM (GMT 0)
No not that im not going to let her go. I said im not going to quit the fight against her depression. That is what I meant.
Posted 5/8/2013 2:56 PM (GMT 0)
Keep moving It foward:

I would like to thank you fo your concern for me. I wish you the very best in life. I feel that by rea ding your coments that you may be going through something yourself and may need to speak to someone. I wish you can become more optimist about life.

In my comment there was no suggestion that I would hold my wife hostage or doing something illegal to her. If that is the way you understood the comment then please speak to someone about what may be going on inside of you. Once again I wish you the best in life. Please take care of yourself.
Posted 7/16/2013 9:12 PM (GMT 0)
I know exactly how you feel. My girlfriend is going through the same thing and is so freaking stubborn.
Posted 7/16/2013 9:50 PM (GMT 0)
Hi MommaClouseof2,

Welcome to the forum. This thread is kind of old, so I don't know that you will get much in response here. Maybe you would like to start your own thread about yourself so we can get to know you.

Depressed people can seem stubborn. But the truth of the matter is that they aren't seeing the situation objectively. Not even close to what we see. I hope you two can get through it.

Keep posting, but think about a new thread...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 7/17/2013 2:24 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you momma. Things have gotten worse. She has stopped speaking to me and considers me the enemy. She overheard m speaking to my neighbor about her depression and now has completely stopped talking to me.
Posted 7/17/2013 2:35 AM (GMT 0)
She does probably feel betrayed right now. But she will get over it. So don't be hard on yourself about it. She is probably a little embarrassed about having depression, but she will realize that it is nothing to be embarrassed about. It might of stung a little though. I hope she understands soon that you meant no harm. Give her time. Like I said, I think she will get over it.

Hang in there.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 7/21/2013 1:23 PM (GMT 0)
I think I lost this battle with my wifes depression. She has packed her things and is moving them out little by little. She also accused me of trying to turn the kids against her.
I would be lying to you if I didnt say that right now im feeling very lost, confused and heartbroken by all of this. The woman that I have loved for 17 years is a complete stranger to me. A woman that I was able to hold, kiss and talk to wont even let me get within two feet of her.
They say death is the worst form of lost, I think they are wrong. Having someone you love completely shut you out, over something you have no control over is worse in my opinion.
I have tried with all my might to help, but the saying is true. You can lead a horse to water , but you cant make it drink......
I try not to cry on front of my kids but its hard. Everytime I look at my kids I see her and the emotions emerge. I feel like I may be causing them more confusion and pain. Its hard for me to hear my kids say that they are scared of their mom. When I speak to her about how the kids feel she respond with " its your fault they feel the way they do". I love my family with all my heart and would do anything, even give up this fight. I be honest im even starting to believe that im the one caused all this grief not her depression.

Thanks for letting me vent.....
Posted 7/21/2013 2:04 PM (GMT 0)
It isn't your fault that the children are afraid of their mother, she must of done something to make them feel that way. You are going to have to collect yourself and keep moving on. Do you go to any counseling? I highly recommend it for awhile anyways. So you can get some direction and grieve properly. Yes, you will grieve, you are probably experiencing that right now.

Keep hanging in there for the kids. Find things to do with them to create fond memories. Move on and hang on to them as family. They need you right now.

Keep posting, it really does help,

Hugs, Karen...
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