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I Am A Rock

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Posted 4/13/2014 1:35 AM (GMT 0)
Parts of a song keep running thru my head today and pretty much describe me. I am desperately trying to not feel the pain and it took everything I had not to cry while with my family last night. I feel like I want myself to feel bad and alone and annoyed and betrayed which I know doesn't make any sense does it? Has anyone else ever felt like this?

I am a rock
I am an island
A rock feels no pain
And an island never cries
Posted 4/13/2014 10:58 AM (GMT 0)
hi there ocean 1. for sure. been there, most of us has. just know we are here for you.
tears awash over many a rock. and an island never cries, it screams i am here all alone.
Posted 4/13/2014 11:48 AM (GMT 0)
i hope things will get better soon you two. jamie's right, we're here for you.
Posted 4/13/2014 2:22 PM (GMT 0)
Rocks, may not cry, but they crack. Islands, well most have rivers and I see them as the tears. Plus Isands are in the middle of large oceans waiting to rescue people and things.

Change those negative thought patterns, it is a gloreous Palm Sunday. Take peace and strength in your higher power and now that these dark times will go away and you will be feeling better soon.

We are all here to support and listen, you are NOT alone.
Peace
Trina
Posted 4/13/2014 10:11 PM (GMT 0)
By choosing not to feel pain I feel like I am protecting myself. I don't feel like crying any longer. I did a lot of journaling and wrote my sister-in-law a 5 page letter telling her exactly how I feel. I will not give it to her ever but it did help a bit putting all the hurtful and painful and angry feelings down on paper how mad I am at hurt for the hateful things she said in an e-mail to me that she also sent to my Mom and brother. It is totally inexcusable and will not be forgiven.
Posted 4/14/2014 1:35 AM (GMT 0)
If you don't forgive, you will not have peace. Do it for you, not her. She doesn't even have to know. But bottling things up and not forgiving just gives us more pain.
Posted 4/14/2014 3:24 AM (GMT 0)
I understand the concept of forgiving my sister-in-law but just cannot seem to do it. Somehow I feel like if I give in and forgive her for her horrid behavior and the even more horrid e-mail she sent me that she has somehow won. Does that make any sense? I do not want to give in to her or ever forgive her. What she said to me was inexcusable and hurt me deeper than I can say. I am trying more journaling to talk to myself and trying to think positive. I hope I wake up in the morning feeling better. Thank you ALL for being here for me.
Posted 4/14/2014 8:15 AM (GMT 0)
I forgive, but don't always forget. I just found in life, it is much easier for me to forgive and overlook things than to carry the burden of not forgiving. But that doesn't mean I have forgotten.

Honestly, make peace with things, life is just too short to hold grudges. And like I said, it isn't for her, it is for you to be able to go on. You will understand one day... And not forgiving doesn't make you a bad person, it just gives you a burden to carry. It is up to you...

Take care and have a good day...

Hugs, Karen...
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