A bit down...

Hi everyone,

I know its been a while since I've last posted on here. Since I've been a way, so to speak, I've been going to my therapy sessions and feel that I made tremendous progress on the job front. I have been applying for jobs and am more determine than ever to get my career settled once and for all. I feel that I am more motivated and focused on getting a permanent job which I wasn't years before. Unfortuatenately, I haven't made ANY progress in my personal life.

I am also taking Lexapro again. My doctor started me on a low dose of it and I've been taking it for almost two months. I don't know if it is working though because I still feel depressed 90% of the time. Although I am focusing on getting a job, and taking action to get it, I feel this new found motivation isn't due to taking meds, but rather sheer necessity and a desire to get this area of my life settled.

I have another appt with my psychiatrist and am wondering if I should switch to another med. When I first meet with my psych, he wanted me to take Lexapro for a while to see if I can tolerate it, then combined it with Wellbutrin. Honestly, he thought that therapy would be more beneficial for me than meds, but I feel I need to get help from every avenue that I can.

I feel overwhelmingly depressed at times. Still dealing with issues in the past, lack of money, low self-esteem, etc. Sometimes, I'm hopeful that my life will get better and sometimes I feel like 'why even bother'. I'm trying so hard to change my mindset and become a more optimistic person, but it is hard at times. I feel like I'm all alone and have no one who can relate to me.

Anyway, I just needed to vent a bit. Thanks for listening.

Post Edited (jb1-again) : 9/13/2014 8:23:08 PM (GMT-6)

JB
You are not alone,this forum is a great way for support and sharing info and listening.It has helped me always to calm down my fears and it is my best family.

You are looking for new jobs and feel it will give you stability ,sounds like a good plan.Good luck!keep us posted~

Keep up good work of trying to be optimistic ,it will help you feel better in bad times.

I am going to start Lexapro soon ,then will let you know how i find it or if I have any q ,hope i can bother you here.
So many changes in job and so can cause anxiety so don't feel overwhelmed .
Take it slow and post here.

JB, hello, heed the Turtle poem indeed.

JB I implore you to go to www.mindful.org and try very hard to read to articles and find something there than will help.

There is a new blog and R. A. I. N. you may find interesting and helpful.

You are not alone, we are here to help. However, you must start building your tool box of coping skills, it is the most helpful way to climb over these mountains of emotions and sorrow.

Love, peace and hugs
Trina

JB...I understand exactly how you're feeling.  I can only say that you are surrounded here by folks who care=)  As for your meds, I take Zoloft (recently increased to 150 mg daily.  It saved my life 15 years ago.  I'm not "happy" as that is not the effect of this med.  I think it just keeps my head above dark waters.  Prozac made me angry and just plain pissed off at everybody.

I don't have much to offer as far as meds.  Each one affects each person so differently.  I DO KNOW that your bed is a BAD place to be spending your "daytime" hours.  Sleep and isolation can be seductive, but only serves to make depression worse.  You should find ways, even if you have to force one foot in front of the other, to distract yourself...walking, running, hiking...helping a neighbor in need...performing some charity work...anything to take your mind off your dark feelings, if only for a few hours.

I want you to feel better.  If I can help, I'm here for you.

~~Dixie

Thanks Jaime. Im a bit on edge. Worried about money and paying my bills.

JB,

Take some deep breaths. In through the nose and out through the mouth. It does help. I have to do the same. I am a bit on edge today myself. I hope it passes for us soon.

Hugs, Karen...

I like what your therapist told you Dixie...

I'm trying not to worry, but money is really tight with me at the moment. It is hard because I am basically supporting myself and have no financial help.

Myself, since I last posted a few months ago, I've been sending out my resumes for permanent jobs as well. It sucks because no one has responded yet, except to send a rejection letter (I guess its' good because at least their reading my resume, instead of it going into a black hole). At this point I'm considering looking out of my state for jobs and/or going to job fairs.

I'll be praying that we both get good jobs soon.