Posted 8/7/2015 12:50 PM (GMT 0)
My ex boyfriend suffered with severe depression, the main effect on our relationship was that when he was down (be it my fault or not) he would shut me out, block my number, block me on any social media, miss events we had planned etc. These episodes would last days, sometimes weeks. I loved him so much and the good times were so good that i persevered with the relationship despite it taking it's toll on my wellbeing. In November, the same thing happened, but this time he didn't come back. He ignored me for a month, then got in touch and said sorry but the apologies just weren't enough for us to get back together, it was all words but no actions. I did chase for a few months but eventually I realised that although he'd make a small amount of contact here and there, it wasn't going to get fixed.
I've sort of moved on, our last contact was May, i miss him everyday and cry most nights but i had got to the point where i wasn't trying to force him into contact anymore. Out of the blue last week i got a message from him asking if i was in as he was outside. I wasn't in so didn't see him but ever since i've been distraught. He wants to speak to me face to face and said he can't say what he needs to say via text. I don't know what to do, he's obviously going to say he's sorry and misses me etc but can a depressed person really change?
I'm looking for comments from people who suffer from depression and pushing loved ones away. I love him and i honestly can see a future with him provided this break has had some sort of effect on how he handles things. Is there a chance he could finally be ready to commit to me, or is this a repetitive cycle that will never end. It's taken me so long to heal to a certain degree, i know if i see him i will be back at square 1 and i'm only prepared to put myself there if there's a chance he can be a better boyfirend who talks about things rather than shutting me out.