chronic illness and depression

Chronic illness and depression seem to go hand in hand. I think most people that are chronically ill have some degree of depression. It is hard with a chronic illness, knowing that it feels like it is going to go on forever. I have fibromyalgia, and no matter what I do it is always there reminding me. The pain, the stiffness, the forgetfulness, the fatigue. Always there. But I remember the real hard part was not knowing what it was. I hope you get a diagnosis soon. You do have pain and you have fatigue. Sounds like me.

I found out with mine, moving is a must. I can't sit still or I will be stiff and sore. So I try to walk as much as possible. It does help. Keep mobile.

We can't discuss suicide, or threaten here. So I really can't comment on that other than mine got better and hopefully yours will too. It isn't gone, but manageable...

Try real hard to focus only on the day at hand. Try not to think a lot about the future. Or to dwell on the past. Try not to think about the things that you can't do anymore. Focus on what you can.

Know that you go through a grieving process with chronic illness. Let that flow.

Hang in there the best that you can.

Hugs, Karen...

That all sounds so familiar. joint/muscle pains, and high blood pressure. I believe pain can raise your blood pressure. I take two meds for my blood pressure now. It seems to be back under control.

I hope you get some help for your pain and fatigue. I started taking Adderall for the fatigue, but had to start taking a generic and it doesn't help as much as the brand did. But it does help some. I use to take pain pills but haven't in quite some time. The pain medications did seem to help, but I had taken them for so long, I wanted to try without. It isn't easy, but it can be done.

Muscle relaxers helped too but they are kind of frowned upon. At least the one I took was.

There are many avenues to take, so you do have options. But all in all, it is difficult when you don't know what you are fighting.

I find certain foods seem to help. I feel better when I eat fruits and vegetables. I eat a lot of fruit. Some people think diet helps, some don't. I guess eating a lot of protein can help too. I go back and forth with protein, meats.

It can get extremely hard to live in the moment, especially if you are grieving the past. Feeling better and having a lot of energy. Do not give up on the future, it is still there, maybe with different plans down the road. Just don't give up.

Hugs, Karen...

getting by,

I apologize, when I say BP I mean the Diastolic BP is high. Usually ranges mid 80s to 90s. The other number is always normal. I am in pain a good 12 hours maybe out of the day and the pain always fluctuates between my head (headaches, sinus pains, jaw pains etc) to joint/muscle, then to chest (feeling like I can't breathe sometimes... not sure if this is asthma related but I only developed it last year so... that's when my health started to decline). On the bright side, I can walk. I can talk relatively well, my speech is change now because of jaw/tongue/mouth pains/tension. My eyesight is okay besides lights staining them easy, floaters, and general pressure on them haha. In general, I am tired but I am not sure if that means I am just depressed. I seem to manage though pretty well. It is just the muscle twitches/jerks and sensitivity to lights/sounds that really bother me. Half the time, I truly feel like I am going insane. I don't know how I am even managing to drive to work everyday and so on so forth.

Sorry for the spill there, there is literally just so much going on with my mind and body.

I am planning on trying to call and find a therapist today. I tried to get into someone good around where I live but they are not accepting new people. I think I really need to see someone though at this point.

I have been making diet changes but, since I've lost so much weight, I am afraid to lose much more. I was at 150 (which isn't the best) now I'm down to 128-130 on an empty stomach in a matter of a two months. Not trying! I am currently not on any medicines either, just take tyelnol or motrin when I am really bad. I try not to take too much though for fear of my liver and stomach in general. I see my neuro in October. I was tested for MS and all the other things, nothing came from it.

You are right, I am not giving up on the future right. Taking it day by day. I have hope that things will turn around. I guess that's how I've always been.

Kelly,

Hi, thank you for your kind words. It is extremely difficult, especially because I was a pretty active go getter before this happened. I was planning on going to college and working two jobs ( I worked 7 days a week!) and all was fine. I couldn't manage college right now, my brain fog gets so bad I can't read sometimes. All my energy goes to work and whatever is left to try to be social. I get to moments where I truly feel like I am dying or I am not going to make it but then I am okay the next day for the most part. During those moments, I get into dark thinking. I wrote above about seeing a therapist, I am really going to call around today to see what I can do. I think a big issue is I cannot express myself right, when I try to talk to friend or family I don't want to seem like a victim but I am truly suffering. We all can at times and it sucks!!!! I will make sure to try and change my thought process to something a little more positive.

Thank you both so much for your advice, I hope you both have a good day and good ones to follow.

hugs,

- Faye