New here

Hi,
I've been up and down with depression for too many years to count. Currently have no desire to get better. I have just stopped caring about anything. The world could go to hell in a handbasket and I wouldn't blink. I don't have any good thing to post my sights on. There is no point.
Just need to get my thoughts out.

Hey red.

Soz mate. Something we all have experienced and or are experiencing. Know we care and will support ya...we do with each other. Keep posting...you have done really good by reaching out. HT

Welcome Red Rain,

Interesting handle. Any special reason behind the choice? Just wondering.

I have just come to the end of months feeling as you do. It is serious to handle alone. So glad you reached out. You have landed in a soft, validating and support place.

Do you have any pets? I have always had dogs. Had fish for a while also, but to much with the tank, filter etc...

Walking helps me, sitting the park and watching kids. I watch baseball. Don't follow it or any team, I enjoy the game, the plays etc....
Most days I have force myself to do things, but once I get going I feel better.
We deserve more than we feel, I practice self-compassion and mindfulness.

I honestly would not know where I would be without these skills in my daily life. Heck these aren't even skills anymore, it as become a change of life style for me. I have become more thoughtful and gentler in many ways.

Here is a link I hope that will help you.

https://www.mindful.org/how-mindfulness-may-change-the-brain-in-depressed-patients/

I meditate. There is a app INSIGHT TIMER, download on your phone. It is free. If you don't find something you like uninstall it. There is music of all kinds, beginner guided meditations. I would say it worth a look
they are organized by categories and they also have groups.

Peace and strength
Trina

I am so happy you have reached out RedRain. I like Peter Gabriel too. Don't give up is one of my favorite songs. I think that is the name of it. I have it on my music on the computer. Don't Give Up... That is a message to you.

I tend to smile even if I am not feeling up to par. I laugh a lot too. But when I do this, I actually start to feel better. I am living in the moment too. I tend to forget about things that bother me, and let them sort themselves out if they can without me. Let the chips fall where they may so to speak. It works.

Some things just aren't worth it. To let it bother us and disrupt our lives. Some things are worth stopping and to deal with. And both give us personal growth.

I hope you are doing okay today too. I hope you have found some reasons to want to feel well. Keep hanging in there and doing what you are doing.

Hugs, Karen...

Red,

So glad feelings are stirring. Good sign.
We all where our masks, I think we do that because of stygmas and an innate desire to be strong.

Somestime, courage is knowing when we did help to ask for it.
This takes more strength than stuffing emotions.

Peace
Trina

Hi,
Getting by - love knowing you're a Peter Gabriel fan! I like Don't give up, too! A good theme song for us all. I have been listening to mercy street- I like the idea of mercy. Giving and receiving. I know that's not what the song is really about but we can take what we need from it, right? So interesting that you start to feel better when you smile and laugh. How long does the feeling last?

Buena - flipping the switch- I like it, very visual and almost automated. When you switch off do you immediately go back to depression or is it more of feeling you can be yourself again? That is horrible about your evaluation- sounds very unfair. Sorry to hear that.

Bnotafraid- I'm glad you're feeling better coming off from months of struggle- good for you! Kids can be so entertaining- and wise beyond their years sometimes. It's always nice to see them before they've been brought down by society's conforming structure. Hope there's still some ball games for you to watch. I'm more of a college football fan, only ever played powder puff.

HT and Mainer- thanks for the encouraging words.

Mercy Street, I will have to check it out. Thanks...

Have a good day all!

Hugs, Karen...

I added it to my collection of music. I think I have "in your eyes".

I get migraines. I take excederine migraine for them. It helps me. I hate migraines because I always throw up. I hope yours went away.

Hugs, Karen...

Red
I am so empathic to you migraines.

There is a migraine forum, you might want to take a look and see if any of the posts help.

my doc gives me ONDANSETRON ODT 4mg tab. melts under the tongue for nausea. It is a blessing!

I try to stay calm with my skills, keep muscles relaxed to reduce the pain level.

I have been listening John Prine and Robert Cray lately, both from my past, still making music. John Prine is an inspiration, he had throat cancer and his voice is not that much different.

Buena, thank you so much for positive feed back. Stuff like that goes a long way, Our little victories feeling so much bigger!
A good friend of mine just passed from pancreatic cancer, he loved John P too.

Music is healer master time. Definitely a transport to peace, for a time.

Peace
Trina