feel alone w/depression

Maddy

I have had depression for over 20 years.  Please understand that there are going to be days where you dont want to even imagine living a life like the one you feel at that time, that is the hardest thing I have dealt with even still.

The hardest part for me with depression is knowing that for the rest of my life I will never know that tomorrow could be the day where I would never experience the "down" like we with depression feel.  I had a garage sale this weekend and I had a lady ask me if  I had heart problems because she noticed my VNS implant.  The reason she asked if I had heart problems is the implant does look like a pacemaker.  I explained to here what it was and why I had it.  After telling her about my chronic treatment resistant depression, she said to me, "oh, come on, you are so pretty and the cutest little shape and you have done nothing but smile and seem really energetic!".  To her I said, that is what people dont understand is that when you clinical depression, it doesnt matter what you have, WHAT PART OF THAT DO THEY NOT GET?!

Although I appreciated her compliments, I did indeed make me a little mad at myself.  How could God bless me with the attributes that are soo worth it but give me a mind that noone wants to deal with, not even me?

Maddy, depression is the worst thing you could experience!  I would rather have a "medical" chronic health than this depression.  I sometimes think that is why God gave me the outwards assets so that maybe I would have a positive reason to be.  Crazy, but I really believe that.

Hang tough, you have a lot of support here!

i am not sure i understnd about which 2meds, not

working together.

Ive been on zoloft for 3yrs in Oct. For my depression.

 My diazepam is for when i get anxiety for certain things like family get to gethers or major shopping like at holidays or for food shopping. I also need it for my PMDD, which is also why i take my T#3s.

I dont know if i have anxiety enough to say i have anxiety issues.

My doc, knows i am sad for many days esp, during my (womens issues). I was wondering if maybe someone knew about womens hormones?

I think my body is lacking some which is why I have PMDD. I have just been DX, w/it about 4mo.

ago, when i switched gyne docs.

Thank yous all again

Maddy

yah, i feel very bad mood swings before aunti-"flow" comes to visit it seems like she almost never goes away totally.

I was asking about hormones because on this fri, i

am having an IUD inserted,planted,put in whatever its called. I know w,the pill there r hormones, w/this tho, i am wondering if seperate pills(hormones) might help w, my mood issues when aunt"flow"  is here.

That seems to be the x's im most depressed which of course is now.

As i understand it the IUD must be done during "flows" visit. For me that seems to last at least 2wks w/flow and at least few days before n after "flows" visit.

So i guess im depressed about 3wks of the mo.

Very bad/sad/moody/angry/upset/pain x's2(PMDD)

Do u think im on the wrong meds, for this? I know yur not a doc, maybe someone w/same issues can answer that.

Thnk yous,

Maddy

You have given some pretty sound advice there in combining meds and therapy. I am sorry to hear that you are going through MDD again and wish you all the best. Perhaps changing the drug would be a good idea even if it is to prove that the drug isn't the problem? There is certainly plenty of support for you and everyone here at HW, so hopefully you will be able to use this as a tool to getting on top of the MDD as you have done in the past.

Warm Wishes

Darren

What has helped you the most in your struggle?

Misty