I'm new

Hello everyone. I am new here. Just a few weeks ago, I would have never thought I would be talking about depression. I have had it very rough for the last 2 1/2 years, but when my wife started to stay out all of the time, I lost it. She says shes going through a depression herself and needs to be out with her friends and doesn't want to be home.

I am disabled, and can not do very much. My wife and I had a fantastic relationship until a few weeks ago. She says she loves me and always will, but she says the house is getting to her. She won't clean, cook, spend time with me or her daughter. I have never given her a hard time if she wanted to go out, but everyday is just too much. She knows this is killing me, but brushes it off. Now i'm crying half the time and not feeling good about anything. I feel worthless and useless.

I just wanted to put my words down to vent. Thanks.

Sad

Welcome to the forum,I am very sorry that you are going through this.

It sounds like you wife is going through a stage where she needs more in her life. I know that is not fair to you...but is there anyway that you can schedule to go out with her also?

She sounds like she simply just wants out of the house...I know that she has obligations and she needs to find an even line to do these things....

Hello everyone, and thanks for the comments. I had a good talk with my wife today, and I am feeling much better about myself. I think I may have made more out of things than I had to, but I just couldn't help it. My wife didn't understand how I felt until today. She apologized for not realizing how her actions were affecting me and our family. Like i said, she is also going through some of her own problems. I try to be as understanding as humanly possible. I told her I would try to do more social things with her if she tried to spend more "us" time at home. Its not that she is out all night staying over friends houses, just staying out until 3-4 in the morning.

So maybe I did read too much into her actions, and I will let you know how everything goes. I do feel good mentally for the first time in about two weeks, and thats a relief.

 

I am glad you did communicate............

It is of the utmost importance IMHO

Good luck and keep us posted plz...............

I also wanted to welcome you to HealingWell.  You can come here any time just to chat with us.  You don't have to wait until things get real bad at home.  We care about you and like to hear about the good and the bad.  You are a part of the HealingWell family now.  Feel free to bounce thing off of us.  I'm glad you are feeling better.

Take care!

Carla

There is only so much you can do to help your wife and you have to decide when enough is enough. Many times people stick to it through EVERYTHING and although some succeed, many make themselves ill. I wouldnt want you to make yourself ill because you are trying too hard.

We will always be here

Darren