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Making friends, sure is hard work T-T

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Posted 9/11/2008 2:34 PM (GMT 0)
shakehead  No no no not again! I have tried doing this cource at my school but (its only beem a week) I still haven't made any friends! I'm sick of this! My shyness around people is too deadly...I used to be so good at it but now I'm back at school again I've lost all my confidence...it's really tough. sad
Posted 9/11/2008 3:50 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Nekodiruai,

Welcome to HealingWell. I know how it is to be shy. Try smiling at people, that usually opens them up. Or just say hi to people when they look at you. I know that it isn't easy, but it can be done.

You will get your confidence back. It has only been a week since you have been back to school. Give it a little time and I am sure that you will do just fine.

Keep posting, I think that we can help you with your confidence issues. And don't be so hard on yourself. Take things one day at a time.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 9/11/2008 4:14 PM (GMT 0)
nekodiruai
I too was shy in school, and very painful to make friends, and wasnt sure the ones I did make were real friends except maybe one. So I know how hard it can be.  I sill dont have many friends, but thats ok, the few I do have I  wouldnt trade for anything. And I have a few good aquantences too.  For me it took time and age to help me, I wish there was site like this when i was in school, I wish there sites period.

School has only been a week, maybe giving it a little more time.

Coming on here and talking about it helps too, venting getting your thougts and feelings out helps you to maybe gain some insight on maybe whats holdng you back,and that may help.

But again for me time, and age, and being blessed to have a least on good friend to help me out.

 

Posted 9/11/2008 8:40 PM (GMT 0)
Heej!

My school (university) also just started, end of the second week now. And since it is my first year, I am also a complete stranger to everyone. But I totally agree with Karen when she says that smiling helps. People will be more likely to talk to you, and if you smile all the time, you will have an easier time talking to others, just because you are happy. I did that for some days, just smile at EVERYTHING, and it worked out.
The times that I start thinking about what others may think of me, I have no confidence left to talk to anyone I don't know, so I just try to avoid that by smiling at the thoughts :).

Another good thing might be just to sit next to someone, and ask a few basic question, like whats your name, where you live, etc. Or talk about movies, what they think of it. People love to talk about themself, so ask the right questions and you will have a good conversation in no-time. That doesn't make in instant friend, but it is a good start. You don't make real friends in one week (unless you spent the entire week with them, day and night :) ).

Just be careful that you aren't blaming yourself for your shyness, it is easy to do so, but it will make it even harder.

All the best, and keep posting!
Erik

P.S: And of course, don't forget that you have already made a friend this week :)
Posted 9/12/2008 7:35 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks everyone! Your comments are really helping me out, alot! :) I will try my best.
Posted 9/12/2008 8:04 PM (GMT 0)
Kudos to you.

I am glad that we were able to help you. Just smile away. People wonder what you are up to.LOL...

It does make you more aproachable and helps for conversation.

Hugs, Karen
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