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Posted 10/31/2008 3:06 AM (GMT 0)
I am in this period in my life where most people would say "the best years of your life"...however, I don't really feel that way. I go to a very nice college with excellent people, classes, teachers, and organizations. But, I do not have interest in any of the organizations or doing work even though I was a great student in high school (academically). I am in a relationship with a guy for over a year and a half---only it's long distance and we can only communicate by email. I am madly in love with him and he seems to be the only thing that makes me happy. I was home for several days because one of my really good friends from high school was killed in a car accident. I was completely upset and I tried every excuse possible to keep from going back to school. My parents offered to let me transfer closer to home, but by the time I transfer my friend will have left for their college experience. I am trying to take each semester slowly. I have friends here but I keep my distance because I want to keep my evenings open to email my boyfriend. I know this probably sounds like an obsession but my boyfriend makes me laugh and feel beautiful, something I haven't mastered for myself. I never thought I was depressed until my mother said that I have built up anger and that I should talk to someone, so here I am....
Posted 10/31/2008 3:25 AM (GMT 0)

chris93021

Welcome to HealingWell and the Depression.  I am so very sorry for your loss and I know losing a friend is a very painful experience.

I would like to see you sit down and talk to your parents telling them how you feel at this time. Perhaps it is time for you to see your physician and have a good physical check up.

You may benefit from some kind of counseling as your kind of stuck right now in your life.

Does your boyfriend feel the same way as you do as you hinted you don't want to miss any of  his emails?

Remember you are a very important person and learn to love yourself.

Again Welcome

Kitt


 

Posted 10/31/2008 3:34 AM (GMT 0)
My boyfriend goes to a military school so he has a lot of stress in his life, it's quite different then mine. He definitely understands that I'm unhappy and offered to transferred to be closer to me, but I would never let him do that. My parents are right both me and him need to develop separately so that when we do decide to get married, we will have a healthy relationship. My mom is right I do have a lot of built up anger.....I guess some resentments....but honestly, I'm really young...I shouldn't be bitter or depressed. I don't want to be sad anymore or feel week and hopeless...
Posted 10/31/2008 10:48 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Chris93021,

There is no should and shouldn't be anything, you are what you are and you should accept that & try and find a solution. I think maybe you need to try and enjoy your experience at college. I know sometimes it's hard to go out of your comfort zone especially when you are missing your boyfriend, maybe you should set yourself some goals? Or try and get involved in more activities and meet new people and at the same time take your mind off things a bit as well.

I think you should definitley try counselling, it could be really good for you.

I think you should try and see your relationship with your boyfriend in a different way, instead of feeling sad that you don't see him often and can only communicate be email, try thinking positively that you have met a guy that you love and that he feels the same.
Posted 10/31/2008 2:51 PM (GMT 0)

Good Morning

Li has said it well, enjoy this time in your life and maybe see a counselor to help you through the reasons for your anger.

The best part of having a boyfriend that is a distance away is the reunions, you are so happy to see them and you can share what each of you have been doing.

Take care.

Kitt

Posted 11/2/2008 3:17 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Chris,  I have read the other posts and agree with what was said.  I do think you would benefit from having a couselor to talk to.  There are probably people to help you through your campus health.  I know you may not think so, but these can be the best years of your life.  You are so lucky to be able to go to such a good college with wonderful classes and professors.  This is the time to take advantage of all your school has to offer.  And as far as friends at school, I think it would help you if you tried to get to know some people better and form some good friendships.  You can still fit in time to email your boyfriend.  And if the relationship is meant to be it will stand the test of time.  Trust me, when you are older you will greatly value the time you spent at this college and all you will learn.  It's time to branch out and enjoy your classes and join in a few organizations.  I don't think you will regret doing this.  Take care and let us know how you are doing.  There is always someone here to answer your post.

Gentle hugs,

Aurora

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