I'm Fate, please only call me Fate. I've been depressed through out my life, sometimes it goes away on it's own. This time the depression seems to be too intense, and I've noticed that I'm developing aggression and anger with this depression. I've been in a relationship for 7 months now, and this is my first serious relationship. My boyfriend and I are considering settling down within a year or two, but he tells me if I don't change he will leave me. I keep blaming everything on him, but it's not just him who has problems, it's me too. He's stopped calling me, talking to me, visiting me, it's as if I'm just some girl he calls his girlfriend. At the end of the day he's not there for me...I miss that. I've also been fired from a job that I worked extremely hard to get, and I was very professional for the job, I had all the training and recommendations I had it all...but they fired me because I didn't fit their image. Now I'm jobless, living in my first ever apartment, on my own for the first time. I'm scared of whats to come and I'm not sure what to do. I can't even finish college because I can't afford it. What I was paying for college came out of my pocket...now there's nothing. I couldn't even buy a cheese burger from McDonalds if you asked me to. My roommate...she drives me absolutely nuts as well. Everyone tells me I should stand up for myself ( She is a smart *** ) She also likes to do a lot of things without even bothering to ask me if it's alright with me, nor does she pay me her half of the rent. ( She's on the lease ) That's another thing that makes my boyfriend upset with me. I try my darnedest to avoid confrontation at this critical point in my life. My emotions are too risky for me to continue living the life that I am. I've even gone back to. I never thought I would do these things again...All alone I can't mend. I have so much more on my mind...I just need one person to talk to...one person that can say "It's going to be okay." At this point...I can't even save me from myself. :
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/18/2009 9:57:50 AM (GMT-6)