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Spring is here, why am I so unhappy?

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Posted 4/2/2009 12:55 PM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone, its been some time since I posted. My depression has seemed to lifted but I still experience it really bad every day. I am still trying to get into the study for DBS and fighting with the VNS I still have.

I love seeing the flowers coming up and the birds singing I just wish I could really grasp it like everyone does.

I hope everything is ok with my HW family, I do miss you
Posted 4/2/2009 1:08 PM (GMT 0)
faithfully4you

Hi there, so good to see you here.  I have been wondering how you were doing.  :) ?

I am glad to hear you depression has lifted some but sorry that you are still struggling on a daily basis.

If you lived in MN you would not be happy even if spring has sprung as we have been having snow on and off since Monday evening.  Looks like the sun is shining here today and I hope it is shining where you are too.

Hugs,
Kitt

Posted 4/2/2009 1:42 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Teresa,

I am so happy to see that you posted. Have been wondering about you. Keep your chin up sweetie, things will be better for you. You have made so much progress lately.

The sun is shining here today too. We have also had snow as Kitt has. Our weather is similar. But it is melting and the birds are singing.

Hope that your day gets better.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/3/2009 2:32 AM (GMT 0)
jamiee saying hi & sends healing light blessings 2 u.  keep strong.  me, male, 37.

Posted 4/5/2009 10:56 AM (GMT 0)

the sun always shines, even when we don't see it or feel it.

jamiee

Posted 4/9/2009 12:51 PM (GMT 0)
Hi all, just letting everyone know that I am ok and tell everyone to have a Happy Easter.

I actually celebrate my 44th bd on Saturday, :^
Posted 4/9/2009 3:21 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Teresa,

Happy Birthday my dear friend. I am glad that things are going okay for you and happy that you posted to us.

Keep staying in the moment and take life one day at a time.

And remember that we are always here for you.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/9/2009 10:18 PM (GMT 0)
Happy Birthday. :-) Have a wonderful day.
Posted 4/11/2009 11:27 AM (GMT 0)
 Happy Birthday Teresa. I hope you have a wonderful Birthday. Forever in my prayers. 

Posted 4/15/2009 4:04 PM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone. Thanks for the BD wishes, they mean everything to me! My birthday was uneventful as much of my days are. I am missing something in my life and I feel it is leading to my unhappiness. Everyday I pray that TODAY will be the day that feel good enough to leave the house or go to the library again.

My cat has not been feeling good and I am really worried about her. There is not alot I can do for her but read up on symptoms and hope she doesnt have them. She is truly my source of support since the day I found her, I dont know what I would do without her.

Easter was ok and my son and I painted eggs and hid them outside. He asked me the other day why I dont ever smile anymore and I told him that mommy isnt feeling good as I always seem to tell him.

Just wanted to say hello.
Posted 4/15/2009 6:15 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Teresa,

I am so glad that you posted, I have been wondering how you have been doing. Being spring is here and the weather is better, I have been feeling better. I hope the same for you. Better days are to come yet Teresa. Be patient. Maybe you need a medication adjustment, though I remember that you had the vns implanted. How is that going?

Keep us posted,

Hugs, Karen
Posted 4/16/2009 9:01 AM (GMT 0)
happy 44!!! keep strong, jamie scool yeah
Posted 4/16/2009 1:56 PM (GMT 0)
Really down today. I am not sleeping good and I am still trying to get into the Cleveland Clinic Trial. I just want to feel better and enjoy everyday but no matter how hard I try, another day passes with fake smiles and closed-door tears. Dreading summer and all the sunny days.
Posted 4/17/2009 3:35 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Faithfully,

Please don't give up hope. I can tell how much you want to feel better for yourself and for your son, and I hope that your doc is being supportive and trying to help you find the right solution. I don't know much about VNS beyond the basic idea of what it is, but are you finding it effective or helpful at all? Do you have a good counselor to talk to? I can see that you've been a member here for a long time, and I apologize for not knowing your story to this point.....I don't have a good understanding of what you have already tried. Please stay with us so we can offer you some support.
Posted 4/17/2009 11:29 PM (GMT 0)
Teresa, I'm with you. Both supportively and in feeling the same way as you do about the beautiful days of sunshine.

We're having some beautiful days and when people say "isn't this wonderful after our long winter" I conjure up what I hope is an enthusiastic yes, it's great. Somehow the sunshine makes me feel so empty because there's no enjoyment in it for me.
Posted 4/17/2009 11:33 PM (GMT 0)
Another sort of humorous thought, Teresa.

There is such a thing as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I get mine at the wrong time of year and for the wrong reasons!

Guess it's really not that funny, but it certainly is twisted.
Posted 4/18/2009 2:41 AM (GMT 0)

Korissa, I think that we really have a lot in common as I am just like you. I have SAD in the summer.  It is all I can do to get thru the summer months.

Teresa, I wish you a belated happy birthday.  I hope you are feeling better. I know how hard depression can be but it sounds like you are really trying.  Think of your son and how much he would like to see a smile on your face. I hope you will keep posting. We are all here to support you and give you comfort.  Take care of yourself.

Hugs,

Aurora

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