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Posted 5/25/2009 9:50 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Korissa, I wanted to write you a separate reply.  Don't worry about sleeping late. It often means you needed the extra sleep. You say you are retired.  Did you retire by choice?  And you also do volunteer work as I do but you say you do not have enough to do.  Is your volunteer work rewarding for you?  Is it a place where you can meet people?  I am looking for a part time job. I retired several years ago by choice but this bad economy has me worried so I want to find something to add a few dollars for bills. Maybe you would like to go back to work part time.  Also, there are many other volunteer opportunities where you can keep busy and meet people.  Have you thought about volunteering at a library or school?  Schools often need volunteers especially in the younger grades.You could take a class in something you enjoy or join a book club that meets for discussion.  Do you like to cook? You could take a cooking class and then have friends over to serve them what you have learned to make.  Do you enjoy gardening?  Many communities have garden clubs and that would be a way to meet others who could become friends.  I am just trying to throw out a few suggestions for things for you to consider.  Being more active helps when you are feeling lonely. Do you have a family or have family near you for support?  There seem to be so many of us on this forum that have things in common. It's too bad we don't all live in the same place.  We could have a great group of friends.  I guess we will just have to settle for being email pals for now.  I hope I have given you some ideas to think about and that your spirits will be lifted.  Please don't hesitate to post me as I will always answer you. Take good care of yourself and let me know if I can do anything for you.

Many hugs,

Aurora

P.s. looking back at my other post to you i realize i have just repeated myself.  Sorry! Just wanted to help. Old age must be getting me

Post Edited (Aurora60) : 5/25/2009 4:06:34 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 5/26/2009 3:02 AM (GMT 0)
Aurora, I guess this was kind of an unusual weekend for me. Family is out of town, friends busy with their families and healthwise, not feeling well enough to do much anyway. You'd think I'd just hunker down and go easy on myself.

I do work with people in my volunteer jobs. One of them is hospice, although I don't have a patient now. A person I know who is a counselor said I should not be doing this at this point in my life due to health issues and the grieving I'm going through now in my own life. I'm inclined to agree with him. But the time I spend with these people always is uplifting. I've had such wonderful people, but I do get attached and then they are suddenly gone.

Hospice was something I had always planned to do when I retired, but I think I can say I achieved that goal and should go on to new things.

I retired a little early partly because I could, and partly because I spent weekends recuperating from the week. I do not wish I were still working. I'm having too much fun spending time with friends. It's really just the weekends that get to me.

In a way I feel like an adolescent again--trying to find my way in the world.

I'm going through a lot of transitions and I think when things settle down I'll be all right.

I do appreciate your caring---
Posted 5/27/2009 12:39 AM (GMT 0)

Korissa,  It is very commendable and noble of you to work for hospice.  My mother was in hospice before she passed away and the people, everyone from CNas to all the volunteers, were just the best.  However, if you feel you have served your purpose and find it stressful you may want to find something else to do. Especially if you are grieving for someone you have lost.  I'm afraid I don't know your story and don't want to be interfering.  If you don't feel well then take the time you need to rest and recover. I guess I have the opposite problem of you.  I have plenty of friends to do things with during the week. It is the weekend when everyone disappears wherever and don't include me.  That is why I find weekends hard.  But if I plan enough in advance I can usually catch someone to do something with.  It is the holiday weekends that are hard on me.  And when they aren't gone I have my sons.  My oldest lives with me.  He has epilepsy and is not at all independent and I am trying to teach him the things he needs to know to achieve independence.  We are working on getting his bills paid in a timely way and then I need to teach him to grocery shop for the proper nutricious foods.  He can cook a bit so that helps.  He went to college close to home and only lived in the dorm during the week, always coming home.  He asks why I didn't teach him when he was younger how to be independent but he never wanted to leave home and I had my hands full with working full time and taking care of my elderly mother. My younger son is very independent but he went away to college in AZ and he was thousands of miles away and had to learn to fend for himself.  But then he is a very open, friendly and independent person.  I try to explain to my older son that I didn't teach the younger one anything.  He just learned on his own because he wanted to. I would like to get my son living on his own. He doesn't want a roomate so I guess we have to find him a small apt.  And then I am going to move to a retirement community.  I have been looking at one that I think I will really like. And then I will have plenty of people around for activities and friendships.  Most places though have much older poeple in their 80s and I am 63. Still I probably wouldn't move for another 5 yrs. Well, as usual I am talking  way too much and probably boring you.  Just wanted to say I am thinking of you and hope you will post if you want to have a chat. Take care of yourself.

Many hugs,

Aurora

Posted 5/27/2009 2:17 AM (GMT 0)
Aurora, you're not boring me at all! I'm glad you've taken the time to tell me about your situation. You sound like a great mom. Very supportive. I have read your posts about your concern for youryounger son when the wedding was called off.

I, like you, will be moving to a 55+ building, but that's been put on hold because of the economy. The builder couldn't get the loan and needs more units sold now under new laws for cooperatives. Also, my duplex sat on the market for too long and I took it off the market as a result. It might be a while before I move, but some days am desperate to leave here.

I look forward too to having people around me in my new place. I'm tired of taking care of a home and there is no one in this neighborhood who I have anything in common with.

I think I sounded like I contradicted myself in my post above. I had said I wanted a job earlier and then said I do not want to work. I meant I didn't wish I was back at my old job full time. I would like to find a part time job somewhere though. Maybe just two days--4 hours each day.

I've said before I would stop hospice, but when they call and need someone I always say yes and am glad I did. I need to get involved in something else--maybe tutoring kids. I'd like to hear some giggles from them if I could make it fun. I need more laughter in my life.

Ok, now I'm probably boring you!

I noticed I don't have the button for email set so that I can be contacted. I'm wondering if I can change it so we could chat that way? I'll check it later.

Many hugs back!
Korissa
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