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Posted 6/5/2009 4:45 AM (GMT 0)
I'm not quite sure what to do with myself.
I had plans to leave for college, but they fell through cause of money. As of now, I have NO idea what I'm going to do in August. I'm not enrolled anymore.

I'm starting to have suicidal thoughts, If I stay at home I will very well lose my mind. I don't ever say or do anything out of the ordinary at home, I mostly keep to myself to stay out of trouble. Randomly, my family gets mad at me and wont tell me why. They steal things from me and I have no money because they take my money.


I have no where to go, no where else to live, no school, and my family hates me. And I honestly don't remember what I did to make them so mad.

This house is so toxic and I can't stand it. I need a plan because I'm so scared I dont know what to do I cant handle all this fighting anymore
Posted 6/5/2009 4:55 AM (GMT 0)
Well, first things first: what do you have planned for the rest of today, or tomorrow? It can be easier to face a new day if we have something planned, or something to look forward to.

As for the summer, here are a few ideas:
* can you find yourself a job, even if it's "just" babysitting? (Do you have a bank account where you can keep your money safe?)
* if you can't find a job, can you volunteer? This can look great on a resume, and can open opportunities you didn't even know existed.
* can you take on a larger project, like learning a new skill or reading all the books by a certain author, or by starting / maintaining a garden?

Longer-term ideas:
* could you join the police / fire brigade / armed forces? All of these might provide you with training for free, and might also provide you with accommodation to get you away from home
* could you join some sort of volunteer service, like the Volunteers Abroad, a mission (if you're religious) or AmeriCorps (if you're American)? Again, this could get you away from home and provide you with useful skills and training.

Just a few ideas, but I really would like to know if you have plans to get yourself through today and tomorrow. You do sound quite low there.

All the best,

Ivy.
Posted 6/5/2009 5:14 AM (GMT 0)
u need somewhere out, somewhere safe. somewhere to rest. look at services within your social services/psych services area for some respite. just a suggestion, stay safe, stay well. sincerely, jamie.
Posted 6/5/2009 11:54 AM (GMT 0)
Taryn, You've had some excellent suggestions here. There is nothing better than making a plan when you are trying to get out of a bad situation. If you can put some ideas down for yourself and start the ball rolling with at least one of them, you will feel some semblance of control over your situation, and feel like you are not helpless to help yourself! Please do check into some ways to get out of the house and be productive.....it could make a world of difference to you, especially considering the toxic environment at home. Hang in there, and let us know how it's going.
Posted 6/5/2009 12:56 PM (GMT 0)
Taryn50894

Good morning and I agree, great suggestions.  I am wondering about a Vocational-Technical School, they have many programs and some are only one year in duration.

Are you interested in the medical field?  Also many companies are still hiring entry level positions and that would at least get you out and earning some money.

YMCA and other organizations hire for seasonal jobs at their camps, that would get you a job and away from home for a bit.  You would be with others as well as have some fun too.

I am wondering about your previous thread re your boyfriend.  Are you still together?  I do not remember you posting that you had broken up or I may have missed it.

Jamie's suggestion is a good one, do you have a safe place to go if you need one?

Take care and keep talking with us.

Kitt

Posted 6/5/2009 6:18 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, my boyfriend and I are still together. We started working on some things, so, so far we're doing much better.
It's just harder now because I solve one problem, and now I get thrown like 4 more.

I appreciate everyones help though..

I currently am in therapy to answer anyones question.
Posted 6/5/2009 10:49 PM (GMT 0)

Taryn,

Glad to hear you and your boyfriend have worked things out.  That must feel good to you.

Keep on talking with us as we are here to support you.

Kitt

Posted 6/6/2009 12:15 AM (GMT 0)

Taryn, you have been given some very good ideas.  Ivy has given you some really great things as possiblilities. And it is true, no one can take your money if you have a bank account so I would try to get that taken care of as soon as you can.  And any money you need on you, you can cash a check or go to the ATM and get money before you are going to do something. If you need to have money on you at home try to find some kind of a small lock box or safe and keep the keys on your person at all times.  You can also keep money in your bra.  I can't imagine anyone in your family trying to search you to take away your money.  The other great suggestion is from Kitt.  There are many vocational and trade schools and they don't cost much and you can get really good training and these schools often have job counselers or help you to find a job.  The medical field is a great one because there are always positions open in hospitals or drs offices.  You may be able to get a student loan or your bank may help you with getting school financing.  I know how hard this must seem to you but if you can get training, get a decent job then you can move out on your own.  You need to just think things out, take it one step at a time and don't let your family stand in your way.  Have you thought about applying for student loans to go away to college? It might be hard to do by August but maybe you can get a loan for the next semeester.  I wish you all the best and hope you will post on what you are doing.

Aurora


Post Edited (Aurora60) : 6/5/2009 6:20:36 PM (GMT-6)

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