Why is depression and other mental ilness so debilitating?????????

Dear Lasbutterfly,

Hello and thankyou so very much for ur reply o me!!! I thought that i was the only person that has gone through hell just to get an ileostomy. Can i ask you what was the dx for you having an ileostomy ect?? You mentioned constipation, was that after ur first op or before the op?? Im just trying to work out why they hve done this?? Maybe you could make ur own thread and explain more about what the cause was,about the op's ect!! Im also really sorry that you have had to go through such "turmoil" in regard's to getting ur ile!! You also mentioned that you are having more surgery next year,why are they making you wait so long for this?? So basically you have a "stoma" and it's connected to a leg bag?? I truly feel for you as when i had my first op they damaged my bladder and is now "atonic" which means that most times i dont feel like going for a wee and when i do i cant empty my bladder properly so i have to use cathetar's but when it first started i had an indwelling cathetar for 6mths then i had a supra-pubic cathetar for 12mths so i had my ileo bag and also the leg bag.

So basically i felt like a walking "BAG" lol...  I also understand being Bi-Polar,chronic depression and my daughter suffer's from ptsd as well as bi-polar,schitz and borderline personality disorder so i do know how it feel's.  Do you have a good doc that you can talk to or a councellor and or other?? It sound's like you need to get alot of stuff of ur mind,so please promise me that you will seek some kind of thearapy and medication if need be?? If you ever need to chat about thing's we cant discuss on the forum just go to my profile and my email address is there for you if you need to talk,about anything ok. Again i thankyou.

sincerly,

damagedgoods41.....    xxxxxxxxxx

Remember your not alone anymore!!!!!!!!!

Dear Karen,

 

How are you? Well i hope. Just filling you in regarding my work load. I now have 7 client's,2 i picked up just last week. I also went into a clothes shop last week after work to get some more tracksuit pants for work and i started talking to the lady that own's the shop about my new cleaning business,i dont even know how we got onto that subject,anyway she asked me if i was available to clean a rental property,which i did and now i have 6 of her rental properties to clean as they are all vacated.

So im doing 4-5 day's a week and a heavy work load. When i come home i can hardly walk, but more so when ive done Frida's home as it's 110 squares all up,a big job. When i started doing Frida's she only wanted me every Friday but now she wants me on a wed & Fri and im relly happy in that respect.

Another thing that is good about Frida's is she also has an ileostomy and has gone through alot of the same stuff as i have so we have lot's in common and she's just a wonderful lady who happen's to be very sick to the point that she cant do any housework "poor thing" as she is riddled with athritis from her neck down to her feet. It's such a shame for a lady who is only 38yrs old and is basically a cripple. So when i do her home i make it just that little bit extra special for her and she really appreciates what i do for her. Sorry Karen im rambling again. It's just when you live in a world of silence and have nobody to talk to!!! So i come here to get it all out.

Besides my work going so well the other side of me is still sad,angry,confused and really dont want to be here anymore as ive just had enough of being kicked around like a soccer ball by my family. And the first week that i started my business my dad said to me "YOU WONT LAST A WEEK" well have i proved him wrong and i truly think he's jealous of what ive acomplished in such a short time.

Anyway Karen i hope all is well for you,how's ur work going are you still very busy?? I would also like to say HAPPY THANKSGIVEN TO YOU AND UR FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Look after urself Karen as your a truly special kind of lady....

 

sincerly,

 

damaged......

 

(((((((((((((((((((((((hugs to you)))))))))))))))))))))))))

I just got another msg saying "hi mum if u go to england you may aswell be dead so i may get you killed and tahlia will never remember you if you go and it's your fault if it screws her up too,then it say's if you try and leave melbourne youll be as good as dead" what is she trying to do to me i dont understand why i cant go and be happy thats all i want and now i dont know what i should do. If i saw her right now i wuld probarlysmack her across the face as i think what she's doing and saying to me is so wrong but then i feel guilt as she also said ive never had a Father and then my mother just abandones me well its not going to happen as long as i live.  what do i do im starting to loose control and i have to put up with mum and dad coming home soon. I want to go for a drive but i cant as i cant thinkm straight and i would be a danger on the road.

 

damaged

 

Beverly,

Seriously, block text messages from your daughter on your phone, as they are abusive and manipulative. I mean it, you shouldn't have to put up with that nonsense.

serafena

I do have a daughter, Beverly, but she's 4. :) She's willful, for sure, but nothing like what you're enduring.

Here's the thing: you feel guilty because on some level you believe Beccy, you believe that she's right when she blames you. And that's just not right. No one should speak to ANYONE the way she speaks to you. She needs help too, but she's still responsible for her own behavior.

But you have to learn that you won't do anyone else any good until you start taking care of yourself. You can't help Beccy or Thalia until you're healthier. And the way your parents and siblings treat you is a disgrace. No doubt Beccy sees how they act towards you and mimics it because she thinks its okay. But it's not.

She's not going to hurt you if you leave -- she's going to miss you. More than she wants to admit. But right now, she's just trying to make you feel bad because she hurts, but she's a grown woman and needs to learn to take care of herself and her own child. It's probably a good thing that you be out of the picture for her, because it would force her to take stock of her life and take responsibility for her own actions.

(((Hugs)))
serafena