Hi Sammie,
Welcome to the depression forum. I am so glad that you have joined us.
It sounds like you have been dealing with severe depression for a long time. I hope that the ECT is helping you. We do have a new member that was asking about ECT about a week ago. Hopefully they will come back and read your post. I am glad that it is helping you. It sounds hard though.
I am glad that you have joined us. I just said that didn't I? But you have come to a good place. Everybody here is very kind and compassionate. You are among people who do understand.
Keep posting and keep us up on how you are doing. You are not alone anymore.
Hugs, Karen