HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

Need Help How to Find out what this would be called...

Support Forums
>
Depression
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 8/5/2010 3:29 AM (GMT 0)
I will go from the start in as short as I can...

In my childhood, was nearly burnt to death, beaten, unloved never listened to the age of 14, Had ADHD.
When was 14 I lived with my dad and things got better at school/social life.
At 16 I met a girl, got into allsorts, Drugs/Alcohol for about 3 years, then had a daughter and stopped lived together.
We lived in rough areas, I used to work, my GF got into it again when was working moved homes about 3 times.

In our final home year 2007 was the worst, My Gf went out every weekend clubbing, I would stay home with my daughter, try and ring her as she was not home 4am in the morning, would get no answer/text nothing and she be away 3 days or so, I would be tracing up and down the hallway worried if she was ok,
This went on for a year on my daughters 2nd birthday she asked me to move out if I loved her, I cried begged pleaded I wanted to stay with her, but then her family removed me and changed the locks,
I got in trouble with police really bad for harrasment orders, when I wanted see my daughter, was homeless,
A year after my daughter was taken into care from her, or to my brother to be looked after,
Still fighting now 3 years on in this time ive found out that she used to prosti, tried suicide, done everything,

I have thought hard for my daughter and her safety, I couldnt have her with no home/job so my brother took her in, my family went behind my back in order to reason with my ex to see my daughter and dont care about me in the slightest,
Later to find out my dad is not really my dad and I have no family ive ever met I was 23 now 25 when found out I searched for him to find he was dead...

So... what I am asking is that ive been to the doctors and he has prescribed me for Anxiety/Deppresion.
But its getting really bad now,
My heart thumps all the time and is tottally heartbroken
Mind is all over the place and think My brain cells are dying due to getting striking pains, (thats recently)
Feel I want to die to ease my pain, but im not a angry guy but really loving.
Cant sleep and ive been through so much and what would somat be called if I was losing my mind,memory due to pain?

It is in a situation where I have no where to turn and nearly jumped off a bridge the other day, but this girl saved me and now doesnt even talk to me so makes it worse to wanna go again...


Appreciate your help Thankyou
Posted 8/5/2010 3:34 AM (GMT 0)
Mark,
I am truly sorry for everything you've been through. No wonder you seem so overwhelmed and confused. Unfortunately, none of us are professionals here. We're just people who've been diagnosed with depression supporting each other. It could be a lot of different possible diagnoses (perhaps you even have more than one). Can you get to a doctor? Seeing a doctor to get a referral to a good psychiatrist would be a good place to start. The psychiatrist can talk to you about all those things & run some tests (psychological or medical or both) to figure out what's wrong. Once you know what's wrong, you can start working on fixing it.

Please know that we are happy to be here to offer support. Keep us posted.


peace & prayers,
frances
Posted 8/5/2010 11:17 AM (GMT 0)
HERE FOR YOU TOO MARK. YOU HAVE BEEN BRAVE IN POSTING. KEEP BEING BRAVE.

THE MAD PROFESSOR

-JAMIE.
Posted 8/5/2010 2:27 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Mark,
I did want to encourage you in one thing. I'm not at all in the medical profession, but you mentioned shooting pains & thought that meant your brain is dying. I don't know, but often that is a sign of depression. Some anti-depressants like Cymalta are designed to help with that particular symptom in addition to the depressed thoughts.

If your current doctor is not helping you feel better & you've stuck with the meds for at least 6 weeks, please try to find another doctor to help you. If it hasn't been 6 weeks, but you're so totally overwhelmed that you can't wait that long, maybe you need to look into a short hospital stay (so they can run some more detailed tests & observe you for more than 20 minutes) followed by IOP (Intensive Out Patient therapy). IOP is a structured program where you go in for 4-8 hours a day up to 5 days a week. You meet with a psychiatrist once or twice a week to discuss how the meds are working, how they're affecting you & whether they need to change the combination of meds you're on. Then there's some time to meet for group counseling. And some programs have specialized programming -- art therapy, music therapy, dance/movement therapy or one-on-one counseling sessions.

Since you mentioned drugs & alcohol (even though that seems to be in your past), it might be helpful to look for a dual diagnosis program. Not saying that you're active in your addiction, just that sometimes our past can still affect the present. Having professionals who understand how substances impact our brains & how addiction issues can migrate from substances to other things (e.g., co-dependent relationships) would offer you a good combination of care.

Hang in there though. I well understand how impossible things seem -- when everything is going wrong all at once. I was there myself. I still struggle sometimes, but things are much, much, much better now. And I believe that if you can just find the right treatment & follow the program, you can get much better too. ;)

keep fighting!
frances
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply