Posted 8/31/2010 8:24 PM (GMT 0)
Ok I'm back. Not prolly as messy as before but pretty much messed up. I'm having terrible mood swings and I'm just feeling frustrated. I have been gyming and though that has helped I still have the anxiety attacks.
This time it's about tomorow ! darn ! It's my exs bday ! The one I wrote about earlier,left me after two years of a long distance for another woman !
I'm feeling stupid to say that I dropped him a call to wish him,thankfully he didn't answered the phone,and i realised that darn it I'm with another man now,I'm in a relation and why am I calling the guy who ruined me to wish him !
it's just I keep remembering a year back on this date I had prepared so many things for him and shopped for him....and I dunno it just came back.
It's messing me up ! I wish I just wake up one day with no scars of this past relationship !
I have to make sure I don't call him caz thats gonna be a victory for me to have ignored something related to him.
My guy has been busy as ever and I have no idea when Im gonna meet him,prolly when I lose my hair and teeth ! Long distance relations !!!!
:(
Maybe one of the reason I'm still hurting over my ex is caz my guy and me dont get quality time together in anyway for me to just erase my memories ! I was used to a guy (my ex)being on the phone the least with me from the moment i woke up till i fell aslp ! And now its jus im alone most of the times. Its like being a wife of some big businessman whose travelling all the time and his wifes back home taking care of his stuff and waiting for him !
Enough of my babble..... I m gonna avoid taking medicines to sleep !