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Posted 7/12/2011 6:53 AM (GMT 0)
I gave This guy my everything. Physically and emotionally. He was my life. He treated me like crap and controlled me but I couldn't stay away. Ubtil 4 days ago he called me yelling and made me feel worthless. But I feel like I'm alone. I just feel so worthless
Please help me. I feel like I need him.

Ever since my dads death I've been clinging on to him
I feel like since I had sex with him no one else will want me.
I just want to die.

P.s. I'm 19

I am sorry sweetie, but we can't discuss suicide on the forum.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 7/12/2011 3:40:39 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 7/12/2011 9:46 AM (GMT 0)
Hi there,

I am sorry for what you are going through. Never let somebody make you feel worthless. That you are not. You are a very special kind person. And you matter in this world. I am sorry that you feel worthless, but know that you are not. Have you gone to any counseling? I really think you need to. So please start. You need to build up your self esteem hon and get feeling stronger about your self. And some grief counseling for your dad would help. Please keep posting, but go over the forum rules when you get a chance. I really feel badly for you and I want you to be happy again. With or without this guy in your life.

Know that you are a valuable person. Nobody likes to be yelled at by anybody. Maybe you should look for a different boyfriend. He shouldn't be yelling at you.

Keep posting hon, everybody here cares about you.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 7/13/2011 3:30 AM (GMT 0)
Hi. I refuse to address you as worthless, because you are not! I"m going to make an extremely long story very short here. I am 43. When I was 16 I met my now ex-husband (for 7 years now). He had the worse temper and I can remember being quite scared at that point. I knew in my "gut" that this was very wrong. However, I had absolutely no self-esteem. I'm hoping that this is feeling familiar to you right now. Moving on, I married this man and had 2 wonderful children with him. All together, we were together 21 years. I should have listened to that awful gut feeling. Absolutely nobody has the right to yell and scream at you or to put you down in any shape or form. This is called verbal and emotional abuse. It is the most awful feeling. I now have Major Depression and Anxiety and have been in counseling for about 15 years.

You are only 19 and have a full life ahead of you. Why don't you skip those middle steps and mistakes I made with my life. Get therapy and counseling now. Learn about yourself and how and why you are a beautiful person. The person you are with is sucking away at your self-esteem to prop his own up.

I know how hard my advice will be to follow. Looking back if i had received this same advice I would have ignored it. But PLEASE DON"T. Nobody is worth putting up with that treats you this way. And it will hurt that much more further down the line when you finally realize that you need to get away. Cut your losses now, get therapy and build a happy and healthy you while you are still young and have your own life ahead of you.

If you need to talk, please post. I truly have been where you are and as the mother of a 16 year old girl, I would hate to see you get hurt the way I did.

Cass
Posted 7/14/2011 9:48 PM (GMT 0)
Dear One,

 

I am not going to call you worthless either because you are not. Many years ago when I was 18, I met a boy pretty much like all the boys I liked in my life until I went into therapy. I always picked the emotionally unavailable guy, the guy that would treat me like next to nothing. How could he be so cold? I thought I needed them, mostly because I thought they were the only kind of man that would love me.

 

I found out something very different. Through journaling, I realized that I have a lot to offer and when the "good" guy comes along, I am worthy. I don't pick men that I need anymore, I pick the ones I want. I also found that I am not good at marriage, but I can be a loyal, loving friend,

 

Look inside yourself, there is a lot to love.
Posted 7/14/2011 10:34 PM (GMT 0)
Laina,

I just wanted to say that I am happy to see you posting. You are an inspiration to me.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 7/15/2011 4:44 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you Karen. I need to post as much as I need to write sometimes.

Hugs,

Laina

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