I Need Help ...

Hello all, thanks for stopping in, I will do my best not to bore you. Where to begin... I am a 25 year old male and have suffered from depression and panic disorder since I was 13, dealt with the suicide of my father at 15 and was sexually molested by a family member from the ages of 11-15. I have been on many medications and have felt like I have THROWN away countless amount of money on psychiatry sessions. I have been off my medication for close to a year now and I need help, I thought I could do this on my own with various herbal remedies but nothing is really working. I honestly do not know where my depression of today is derived from. I am successful, live a normal happy life. I just feel like there is something deep inside me that I cannot break free from, its almost like a fog in my brain, somedays I can see past the fog for split seconds and it feels awesome, kind of like almost drowning coming up for water taking a breath then going back under. Is there anywhere I could go tomorrow and start to get immediate help? I cannot afford psychiatry sessions and every time I go to a family doctor they want to pass me off to one. I just don’t know what to do and my days are getting worse.

 

Thanks

If I were to take a guess I would say that much of the cause behind your depression is due to still having unresolved feelings about your father and/or about being molested. Either one of those can leave very deep scars that can take years of healing, but if they don't heal fully they will either sneak up on you and bite you in the butt when you least expect it or torment you like a rattle in your car that you can't find.

You should check with your public mental health department. Many times their services are either free or the fees are income based. If you have health insurance look to see if you have mental health benefits and if you do look for a psychiatrist or a psychologist that is willing to wave the deductible and co-pays.

As far as medications go, you may or may not need them. I suggest getting into counseling first and make a real effort at it and then if you feel there is a "wall" that you just can't quite get over talk to your family doctor about getting some kind of anti-depressant. Your primary physician may be more willing to help you out with medication if s/he knows you are also in counseling.

Quite honestly medication is not going to work very well on its own at this point. You need to fully deal with those skeletons in your closet too.