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DONT FEEL DEPRESED BUT....

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Posted 9/6/2011 3:58 AM (GMT 0)
i have been on deepresion medicine for 3 years and last month they just uped it to 100mg on zoloft......  I feel great now im doing well in school good at home i had a really rough last 3 years :ill summrize it i was having reckless unprotected sex...  and doing  running away all the fun stuff) so about a month ago i admitted my self into an inpatient hospital to get "HELP" i knew i wanted to change but i wanted to makesure i could and needed the right tools to belive in my self . iam getting this major sugery next month a colonotmy (colon removed) and just about 10 min. ago i felt at ease about the whole thing. but some things are still bothering me .

i knowdeep down in my heart i want to continue all these bad behaviors but when im doing good i know people are proud of me and it makes me feelgood that there proud of me but on the flip side i LOVE the scandolus feeling and being .....this is my last year in high school i have goals for myself....but its like i dont know what TYPE of life i want to choose because i cant do booth

when im good i feel like im hidding the reblious part of me and when im rebeling i feel that im hiding the good part of me.

 

I JUST DONT KNOW  sad

I am sorry Jackie, but we can't discuss illegal drugs on the forum.  Karen

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 9/6/2011 7:30:01 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 9/6/2011 4:11 AM (GMT 0)
Quite honestly a big part of that is called being a teenager. You are quite old enough to know better but yet young enough that in many ways you think you are invincible.

Yeah a lot of that stuff is fine, exciting, exhilarating, etc, but it can and often does carry with it a very high price.

When I look back at some of the things I done when I was in my teens (42 now) I can only shake my head and wonder how I lived through it. I can also remember thinking that I was just a bit smarter than everyone else and knew how to beat the odds. I did beat most of them, but it wasn't due to smarts. It was just pure dumb luck.

One of my personal favorite sayings is "You don't know how young and dumb you were until you get a bit older and a bit wiser."

There are all kinds of highs, all kinds of excitements, all kinds of fun out there. The real trick is finding the stuff that really turns you on that is positive and will have a positive influence on your life both now and in years to come. For me my two highs were martial arts and roller coasters, until I became a parent that is. Since then being one has been the biggest one ever.

Now I am not telling you to run out and become a parent. Plenty of time for that. What I am saying though is to find the positive things that really trip your trigger and really get into it and before you know it that rebellious part of you that like the dangerous stuff will be history.
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