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feel like a yo-yo

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Posted 10/8/2011 10:09 PM (GMT 0)
So, here I go again. This thing is up and down and up and down. Right now the yo-yo is at the bottom of the string spinning. I'm getting too tired. Can't be happy. Not interested in too much of anything. Can't keep the shoulda, woulda, coulda, it's too late at bay. I have an appointment next sat. I'm afraid I am going to go so far that I will be lost, because this person I see isn't me. I am so, so sad right now. I'm supposed to go to a friends bday party tonight but I can't find my happy mask. The effort it would take to pull it together - I don't have the strength. Just want to lie here and cry - perhaps I will fall asleep. Thanks for listening. I think its about to take over, I can feel the shakiness creeping up shakehead cry cry cry
Posted 10/8/2011 10:54 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Stillme,

Try to shake it off and go to the party. You will be surprised at how much better you feel once you get out. And if it doesn't pan out, you can always go home. Try not to just go to bed. Give yourself a chance. But if you do go to bed, don't beat yourself up over it.

I hope that you feel better soon.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 10/9/2011 12:26 AM (GMT 0)
I feel you stillme. It will be very hard to get up and go, but Karen is right. You will probably be glad you went and even for a little while, takes your mind off the woes.

Sometimes I really literally have to force myself to go out and come home exhausted, but glad I did. So try and like Karen said, even if you do stay home, you'll know you tried. Take care and let us know.

Maggie
Posted 10/9/2011 12:27 AM (GMT 0)
I hope I'm not losing my mind. Feeling sad and alone again. Even the dr must think I'm crazy. I will have seen her 3 times in only about a months time. I seem better for about 3 days then its back down. EVERY week. She increased the medicine.

I have been taking the medicine at night, because I thought it might help with drowsiness. I wonder if it matters. Perhaps I should try mornings. Any thoughts on the time?

I just want to be better.
Posted 10/9/2011 1:15 AM (GMT 0)
What's the new med? I used to take welbutrin in am and evening. My sleep sucked and felt down. Then they put me on anextended release and that really helped. If it is disturbing your sleep, that would definitely account for the low moods. Sleep probs contribute to so many things

I hope you start feeling better ALL the time. I started abilify 3 weeks ago and I am feeling much better. But then today, I was reading a book and just burst into tears, out of nowhere-I don't know...i wish we could all find the right combo and just be able to have a better life, y'know?

You sound like such a great person and I feel so bad when y'all are down too. This dam depression is a rollercoaster...you just never know what's around the bend.

Anyway, that is not very cheerful-LOL!! I hope you sleep well and wake up just happy as a clam(R they happy?) I hope the weather is lovely and you are able to get out of the house . Let us know

Maggie
Posted 10/9/2011 1:50 AM (GMT 0)
I started with citalopram 20mg. Then 2 weeks later dr increased to 40mg. Been doing 40 for only a week now. I know it can take the meds a while to kick in. Just don't know why I can feel like I'm improving then back to start.

Yes this is a roller coaster and I want to get off. Well my sleep has been better. I used to have a hard time falling asleep, then once asleep I would wake up every hour. Now I usually just wake once at 3:30 or 4:30.

You made me chuckle Maggie. Thanks.

Wishing all of us happy days.
Posted 10/9/2011 7:15 AM (GMT 0)
happy days stillme, maggie, karen and all the depression posters. jamie
Posted 10/9/2011 2:41 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Jamie,

Happy days for you too!

Hugs, Karen
Posted 10/9/2011 4:47 PM (GMT 0)
Felt a little better when I woke up. Have had flashes of sadness. Hope I can hold it off. Thanks for the happy day wishes and I'm bouncing them right back to you Jamiee and everyone else too.
Posted 10/9/2011 8:33 PM (GMT 0)
Hey stillme
How goes it? When I started abilify, I swear that I felt better within 2 weeks and the following week went into a bad funk, so I think the meds (your celexa) are beginning to work, just not all the time. But, hey, what do I know?

I had those flashes of sadness too today. It's like a wave that sneaks up behind you and wham! you start crying or getting anxious. Hour later, I am humming or ok..
Well, I guess we just have to savor the good moments and ride out the bad and hope the scales tip the right way.

Cheers to all of us-

Maggie
Posted 10/10/2011 4:44 AM (GMT 0)
MUCH HEALING AND LOVING COMPASSION TO US ALL. jamie
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