Posted 12/23/2011 3:34 PM (GMT 0)
My name's Gordon and I frequent the ulcerative colitis forum on the site as that's what I have. I'm posting over here as I'm in a situation that I don't quite understand how I should handle it. I have a girl living with me..we've known each other for about 8 years and have always been great friends. Over this past year we've been getting a lot closer physically. Long story short, she was just recently in jail for about 3 months and I have stood by her every step of the way. She was released on house arrest which is when she moved in with me. Things were going awesome but she did tell me that at some point she was going to get hit with some bad days trying to re-adjust being out of jail. She went through hell in there. She's seen a doctor for quite some time in regards to her anxiety, stress and depression. She is also very self conscious about her weight as she put on a lot while in jail. She used to be 110 and now is 150+. Well about a month ago it was like someone flipped a switch and she got hit with depression pretty hard. I've never experienced being with anyone with depression so this is all new to me. She's been very down, very cranky and short with me, the physical affection between us has dropped considerably and most of the time she doesn't even want to talk at all. I can't give her a simple hug as she doesn't want to be touched at all right now for she's very self conscious about how she looks. We've had discussions and she is assuring me that it's not me or nothing I've done that's causing her to feel like this. In all honesty this is bringing me down as well as I want to be with her and have told her that I'm there if she needs anything. I feel completely helpless on how to handle this situation. Even though I understand it's not me that's making her feel the way she is, it still brings me way down. She can tell when it's upsetting me and she separates herself from me. She doesn't want me to feel that way because it's not me. I just don't know what I can do to make things easier for her. Depression is completely new to me and not understanding exactly how she's feeling is very difficult for me. I know she's currently taking medication but I'm not sure which one. If anyone has any suggestions it would be greatly appreciated. I told her I'd pay for her to see her doctor a second time each month as she has no health insurance and is currently only seeing him once.