Posted 12/7/2012 8:06 AM (GMT 0)
I have been hurting pretty good today. I actually got to play an entire tennis match tonight, however. (This was good to help with the negative thoughts and anxiety). Two sets and a tie break. Probably totaled about three hours on the courts. Regardless to say I lost--a big L for me. So much pain in my knee and ankle that it got hard to play. I was pretty down about it. I wanted to win so bad, and I am tired of my injuries/arthritis ruining the game. It is almost like it has shot down all of my hopes of playing at the next level. I have gotten to where I don't even consider being able to do it anymore because I know that the nagging hamstring tendonitis, chondromalacia patellae, osteoarthritis, and accessory navicular syndrome will always pull the loss. The depression just feeds off of this. The physical pain makes it very easy for the mental/emotional pain to be heightened.
It's so frustrating, and all I can do is try to keep playing to the best of my ability and forget the constant pain.