Posted 2/17/2013 8:53 PM (GMT 0)
I am new here and need some help. I feel like my friends are getting tired of listening to me. I feel so pathetic and sad. My husband left me 4 years ago for someone else. He said he was miserable with me. I have never really recovered. I keep going though the motions, praying, and get a little better, but then have a relapse. I don't know what to do. A lot of the time I wish I was dead, but I would never kill myself. I have 2 kids. My daughter is 8 and lives with me. My son is 14 and moved in with his dad last year. We live in a small town with all of my ex's family around. I feel like I don't belong. My son is not that nice to me or his sister. I think he loves us, but he only gets a hold of me when he needs something. I call or text him everyday. Sometimes he responds, a lot of the time not.
My ex has went through several girlfriends since we split, and I can't seem to move on. A friend of mine introduced me to a friend of hers and we talked for several months before going on a date. I get along with him really well, but there is no physical chemistry on my part. Since the date, we have cooled things down and I have sunk into a deeper state of depression. I am thinking I will never feel good again. I see my ex all the time with his new girlfriend. Everyone seems happy but me. The house he lived in was in both of our names and he walked away from it. I have been trying to short sell it, with very little help from him. He is not a bad guy, he just only seems to care about what affects him. He is a good dad and stays involved. We don't communicate very well. As long as he controls how things go, we are fine, but if I don't like something or agree, he is done talking to me. He makes me feel like I am crazy. If I would just listen to him, I would be fine. Mostly, this is about kid issues. He tells me what I think and tells me it is my fault that my son and I don't get along. Sometimes I think he is right. I don't know what to do.