Jail

Hey AV,

JB is right. Don't give up. If your husband wouldn't pay for a lawyer, you should keep trying to get one still. There are some that may be willing to do payment plans.

Hang in there. Keep trying.

UA

No family. I cut all but my grandmother out. She's on ss and on a very tight budget.

Without him, I have no car. I'd have to get him to take me.

I have been trying to find a job that I can do but I can't stand or walk much because of my knees and arthritis in my so joint. I thought about going back to being a cna but there's no way I could lift a resident. I'm afraid I'd let a resident get hurt because I can't support their weight.

I wasn't ever given a ring. I thought it was a waste of money.

I just feel like the worst person. What did I do to make my husband treat me like this. I've so many bad things in my life. I've forgotten what it's like to not have stress. I'm beginning to think I'm just meant to not be happy.

I wonder if your husband's parents would help you. You have said you get along with them and your MIL knows he's a jerk.

Sherrine

I'm in and out of this forum, so I'm not sure what you're facing charges for...

That said, when you go to court, with or without an attorney, I would make sure the judge is aware of your various health issues and daily medications.

I'm a reporter, so I spend a lot of time in courthouses and hear the talk behind the scenes. In my state, you have to be provided any necessary medical visits and all of your medicines at no cost. Judges will do almost anything except send someone to jail if they've got health issues around here. One guy charged with robbery got away with paying a $25 fine and court costs, because he was on like 10 prescriptions. Seriously. Often times, they'll give people probation.

Just a thought...

I called legal aid this morning. I have to apply and see if they will take my case. Unfortunately, their application line isn't open on Fridays. I'll call on Monday. I've called a few other places but most seem to be closed on Friday.

I also did some research. It's possible that my husband would have to keep insurance for me even after the divorce. I'm going to ask. A lawyer about that possibility.

Home is very stressful. I don't have an opportunity to cry about it because my daughter would be upset. It hurts to live with someone that you love, despite him being a donkey's butt, and have this huge strain between you. My anti anxiety medication isn't working so I've been having nonstop panic attacks. I'm trying to just breath through them. I have an appointment with my psychologist next week. His wife is a psychiatrist so he can send me to her for med changes. I've been off any kind of antidepressant for a few months and I think I may need some to get me through all of this.

To AV ......

   Please go after the legal aid first and foremost. And if all is well there, is it possible for you to at least temporarily stay with your grandmother?

   Try to build a ground ... from which to work. After dealing with the legal and residence issues ... then determine your future ... that is, finances, working where, your kids and of course - yourself with some degree of independance.

Wishing you the best.

Sorry to hear of your troubles.... Legal Aid and butt kicking for hubbie. So much good advice has gone before.

These guys are right AV, you should call the courthouse today and get this ball rolling. At least get some information.

Know we are all here with you....

Hugs, Karen

Good first step, AV. You might hear by Monday. I don;t think jail is realistic sweetie, so I wouldn't worry about that.

I don't live in the county where I'll be going to court. I live in a more urban setting, as much of one you can get in Arkansas.

I see the surgeon on Wednesday. It's sad. I want my shoulder fixed but its going to be the hallmark of my divorce. I'm tired of the treatment I get from him but we've had 4 years where he wasn't. He can be so supportive but that part of him is missing now. I tried to talk to him about how stressed and worried I am and he just reminded me that its all my fault. I know it is.

I don't know that I can describe how I feel. I'm starting to just not care. Every time I work to make things better, it always falls apart. My son is saying he wants to live with his dad. Which breaks my heart. I feel like its just not worth fighting for a life that is crumbling.

AV

I have been watching your posts here the last few days. I have to agree with the others. DON'T give up! Pick yourself up by the belt loops and FIGHT!

They have to provide you representation if you can't afford it even if you don't live in the county the court is. There are always young lawyers who do pro bono. If Arkansas is anything like Illinois they hate to have people with serious medical issues in jail, too much burden on the state that's already strapped for money.

Take care,
Bill