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Posted 9/21/2013 11:17 PM (GMT 0)
My name is John and I'm almost 33. Firstly, I'm sorry anyone feels the need to come here. If you didn't, we'd all be happy!

I've had issues with depression since high school in the late 90s. By the time I got to college, I started an anti-depressant, and when I wasn't satisfied with it, I tried a few more (not simultaneously).

Some time after that, I started becoming a hypochondriac. My hypochondria is the big reason I'm here. I saw no other applicable topics. I can't participate in many sexual activities without feeling I've probably caught something. I recently had surgery and am greatly struggling with recovery. I came here for support, and for the most part, folks in the GERD section frightened me. I know they mean to help, but it really didn't. They have me doubting my doctors.

My father has cancer, so when I can forget myself for a minute, I think about him. I moved back home to be with him a little more. I'm an only child and am single, so much of the time, I feel I have no support or anywhere to go. Between my recovery and my father's illness, too much is falling on my mom.

I find no solace anywhere and feel little hope. I feel I won't recover because maybe my doctors remind me when I thought they knew best.

I feel like there's not much hope anywhere.
Posted 9/21/2013 11:33 PM (GMT 0)
Perhaps I should have gone with the Anxiety Disorders forum. I hope my sight isn't going, too! lol

...depression is somewhat applicable.
Posted 9/21/2013 11:44 PM (GMT 0)
Welcome to the forum Smooth,

Being a hypochondriac will drive anyone into depression. You are constantly in the future worrying about things that have not happened yet.

I suggest you take a look at meditation and mindfulness. It will help keep you focus and in the present time frame, so can enjoy more of the time you and your father have together for starters.

Most of us find that antidepressants work well in "cocktails" meaning more than one working in unison.

You are welcome to post here anytime you like, we are here to listen and support the best we can, we welcome you to review the "resources" at the top of our forum and we ask that you read the rules when you have time.

I wish you peace and courage
Trina
Posted 9/21/2013 11:57 PM (GMT 0)
Trina,

It's probably not strange to feel like the following: My mind is running a thousand miles a minute, so it feels impossible to turn it off to meditate.

I'd like to focus in the present. I feel like I'm in the present a lot, but the future equally as much.

I tried Amitryptiline (sp?), Welbutrin, Celexa, and Lexapro. I found them to have undesirable side-effects.

I did see the resources, but was unable to find the rules.
Posted 9/22/2013 9:41 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Smooth,

Welcome to the forum. When you are on the page that lists all the different forums, at the top are the rules. I think ... I haven't looked for them in awhile...

The meditation helps the mind to slow down and so does the mindfulness. Keep trying, you will get control. Practice daily... I use meditation to sleep now instead of sleeping pills. I use to not be able to shut my mind off and now I can at the drop of a hat. So keep practicing...

You will stop worrying about the future with the mindfulness.

There are many different meds to try. Some have side effects and some wont for you. You just have to find the right one.

Best wishes, and again welcome.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 9/22/2013 10:08 AM (GMT 0)
Hi John,

the rules are on the top right of any thread you are reading or posting.

Yes it is not "strange" to feel the way you feel, it called having racing thoughts. Rispadal is good for this.

However, I like "coping skills" better that medication, even though I am on meds. Mindful walking will quiet the mind and it is easy.

www.mindful.org and the blogs there will be very helpful. Once of the easiest coping skills I have found to adapt to. Basically talking you everyday doings, slowing them down and concentrating on them. It will slow you down. It all just takes practice.

Peace and courage
Trina
Posted 9/22/2013 12:35 PM (GMT 0)
Hi John

Depression, by its' very nature will turn a headache into a brain aneurysm. Depression is negative thinking in all areas.

As one of our members said recently, bewarfe of Dr Google.

Sounds like alot of meds...maybe it is time for an overhaul....start all over again. I have done it several times. Some meds work great til they don't.

You are under a lot of strain...discuss with a doc

ASnd if ya like us c'mon back and post

Mags

Posted 9/22/2013 1:17 PM (GMT 0)
Hi 1039smooth,

First of all, welcome to this little page here in the internet and for your information, you're not in the wrong forum because your problem could also turn into depression but I hope not...

Anyway, you have to take a deep breath and take everything slow and steady. It's hard to 'turn off' this health/anxiety phobia but you can always remember that there's nothing wrong with you. You may not trust this message at first but you can try. You can always try and try and try. Take one step at a time and I assure you that we are all here to support you.

We all got your back so take your time :-)

Putting all my healing thoughts for you,
Joanne
Posted 9/22/2013 10:53 PM (GMT 0)
Doubting your doctors is a rather horrible place to be in, and I feel you on that one. It is not nice to realise that a group of people you probably once thought of as omniscient don't actually know everything. (Mind, some doctors still act like they do. It's like the old joke: Q. What's the difference between a surgeon and God? A. God doesn't think he's a surgeon.)

That said, internet folks tend to be know-it-alls as well (like me <_<). But at the end of the day, we don't know your medical history or your doctor. I would not let the internet persuade you that your doctors are on the wrong track without some pretty damming evidence. That said, it can't hurt to hear a second or even third opinion and it may perhaps yield new, more reassuring, information.

I'm sorry about your father. Sounds like a difficult situation all three of you are in. I'm not surprised you're feeling the strain of it and suffering from anxiety and hypochondria (doubtless further exacerbated by pre-existing depression). Sounds like you've felt isolated for a long time as well. I wish I could offer up a solution. I could say 'build up a network of support', but how does one go about that? Danged if I know. All I can do is wish you the best.
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