From my introductory post it might seem I have everything under control but I am far from good. I have to force my self to do the things that I do. Because of my low blood pressure and sinus infection problems I was dropped from the only class I was actually attending the rest are online. Other than going to my shrink and my group at RHA and going to the grocery store I never leave the house. I ran a business for more than twenty years and interacted with the public on a daily basics but now I have no friends and hardly talk to my family because I feel like I am a bother to them. They never call me unless they want something. My husband only comes home on the weekend. The only friends I do have are my cats who are the light of my life. I also have 2 dogs one was a stray and half wild dog that stays outside but he comes and goes as he pleases because he is half wild but he is a very good dog when he is home. My other dog goes out of town weekly with my husband. When I and not trying to keep busy and trying not to think I spend my time ruminating and thinking about
why my father molested me and other crazy things that I don't need to think about
. I am on the computer all the time and studying trying not to think at all. I'm hoping the Lexapro will kick in and help stop these crazy thoughts but so far nothing. I always feel so sad and lost when I'm not forcing myself to stay busy.