FAMILY'S ARE REALLY TOUGH SOMETIMES! I think I'll close this thread with just a few comments and observations.
I'm tempted to say ... those of you without any children are lucky! But i can't do that. I guess though, sometimes it is accurate that there is a fair comparison ... that is - the love of a dog for the dogs master (if you will) is at times close to what a parent has for a child ... love with or maybe without a return back of that love.
I do know someone who lost their son at the age of 24. It must have been devastating. It is so many years later now, and she still feels the loss. I know I never want to know what that feels like.
My oldest daughter has more on her plate than I had thought - and I'm sure I still don't know how much is actually there. I called her two days ago for one reason - and found out accidentally she is in the middle of at least one major decision and/or problem I didn't know about.
Paranoia has overtaken her sense of judgement. She's ready to quit her job because several of the people under her are threatening to quit unless she quits. At least that's what she's telling me. It is believable to me - because paranoia is one of her mothers strongest reactions to people.
There are other very concerning things to me I'm hearing or seeing in her that I'm helpless with - not the least of which is her sincere need to see a therapist. Again, her opinion is like her mothers ... denial ... and then "only crazy people go to see a therapist"!!!! My daughter tends to drop people out of her life (let's say if they don't agree with her) ... again like my ex-wife - her mother.
There also are two grandchildren involved here ... very well-behaved girls ... two beautiful girls - so sensitive and so vulnerable.
I can't walk away from 3/4 of what's left of my family ... and I don't mean that in any self-pitying way. I've got to be there in case .... you know what i mean?
My youngest daughter always has made me proud from her general politeness to people - to her attitude of hard work paying off. The last few months she has closed the loop in our relationship.
I think what any father wants, at least this one - is a feeling of respect from his kids. I've never felt a lack of respect from her - but always had felt she was, at times, uncomfortable about talking to me about some things in life.
That has completely turned around. It is wonderful. This is when I feel a little sorry for those who don't have kids .... like now my life is complete.
She'll be moving 1100+ miles away soon - but I'm good with that. I'll miss her - but she's on an exciting trip in life that should help her fulfill a lot of hard work of hers in the past thru Bradley University and the University of Illinois with a B.A and M.A. degree - and in the dying field of journalism.
I wish her Mother would realize this.
Thanks to many of you ... and especially Karen. I'll still be here - just think my family things now need to be a little more private - especially the tough relationships. Take care of your family relationships - don't let them slide if you can.
Peace and wellness
Rob & Gizmo