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Freshly off Zoloft - anger/sadness issues.

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Posted 1/15/2014 5:14 PM (GMT 0)
I was diagnosed with severe ulcerative colitis in 2008, and in order to control the anxiety that came with the disease my doctors placed me on Zoloft. The highest milligram I'd been on was 100 mg. I can't say that it had much effect, but maybe at the time helped with anxiety. In other words, I hadn't really had problems with anxiety/depression before my diagnosis. I had a few ups and downs in college & highschool but I wouldn't have labeled myself as depressed, as I never had the symptoms. In the past couple of years I've achieved remission with my ulcerative colitis and therefore was able to taper off most of the medications that were treating it. My colon is doing fine - great, in fact, as I just had a colonoscopy in November which showed no signs of active disease. Coupled with tapering off of my UC medications, I decided I wanted to get off of the Zoloft too. I started a very, very slow taper in September of this year, cutting down from 30 mg. to zero by Christmas. The holidays went fine - they were actually great. But in the past couple of weeks I seemed to have plummeted. I am extremely irritable and sensitive. I have horrible crying fits, and last night I even found myself moaning and screaming. My boyfriend is wonderful and patient but I just don't know how to describe that I'm just in pain somehow. I hate everything. I am not looking forward to anything. I'm negative, jealous, and unhappy, and my self-esteem is in the dumps. I feel like I want to bust out of my own skin. I want to be happy again, but I don't want to go back on medication. I don't know if this is symptoms of the withdrawal - this mania, really. And if it is withdrawals I'm so angry that I took the Zoloft in the first place - because it has changed me. Has this happened to anyone else? How long does this last? I read some places that it can take several months for it to completely leave your system. Other people complained of muscle soreness, dizziness, etc. after tapering off, but I'm just feeling like Jekkyl & Hyde. I need someone to tell me there's a light at the end of this tunnel and that I can find my old self without going back on medication. cry
Posted 1/15/2014 6:17 PM (GMT 0)
Katie,

It really sounds like you need an antidepressant. I would talk to the prescribing doctor and see what they say. But to me you sound depressed. I hope that you feel better soon.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 1/15/2014 6:18 PM (GMT 0)
Why do I sound depressed and not just going through a withdrawal process? As stated before, I wasn't like this before I got on the Zoloft.
Posted 1/15/2014 6:57 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Carl. I did taper with the help of a therapist, and I am using Lorazepam for sleep and as needed. I am quite determined to tough it out. I was just hoping for someone to say that what I am going through - at this point of my withdrawal - is normal and that it will pass. I do have hope that I can and will be happy off of the Zoloft. I didn't know anything about Zoloft when I got on it...I just said "ok" when my doctor's pushed it, because I wanted to do everything that would help my UC. It just seems really tough right now... but I don't feel like backtracking and then doing this all over again would help me.
Posted 1/15/2014 8:18 PM (GMT 0)
I take .5 milligrams of Lorazepam to help me sleep if needed. I never take it during the day. Sometimes I don't take any at night. I've never taken it for daily regimen - it's always been "as needed". I haven't taken more than usual over the last couple of weeks. No self-destructive urges. Just a lot of crying and feeling extra blue. Super sensitive emotionally. I re-read my post and what I meant by "screaming" was that I screamed at my boyfriend, which is out of the ordinary for me. Basically I just am acting out of the ordinary. Luckily I haven't smashed any dishes! There's just been an overall change in my mood and the way I see things since I've been completely SSRI "clean".
Posted 1/15/2014 9:06 PM (GMT 0)
I think Carl is right. It does sound like your body has become use to the seratonin. The things is, that doesn't mean you aren't going through some type of depression. Be it within you or from the lack of the meds. It still warrants a talk with a professional. We aren't doctors here, just a group of people that understand how you feel.

You may need something to get yourself back balanced that is easy to go off of when the time is right. Please don't let yourself continue to suffer.

I am glad that your other symptoms are gone and that you are feeling better in that respect.

Best wishes...

Oh and the reason that I said you sounded depressed is because your symptoms are what people have when they are depressed. So keep an open mind to what the doctor says to you.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 1/15/2014 9:13 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you for all of your suggestions. I think I'm being misheard, however, because I am seeing a professional, and we both agreed (the professional and I) that the time was right to start tapering off of the medications. I guess my question was geared towards those that had successfully tapered off of Zoloft and had experienced withdrawal symptoms. I guess most of the people in here are not off of anti-depressants. I think maybe I need to find a forum for people who have successfully tapered. I don't see the solution to what I hope is a temporary issue (it's only been 2 weeks) as jumping back on an anti-depressant just cause it got hard. I knew this was going to be hard, but I was looking for someone to give advice as to a timetable. More like a "hang in there!" response...
Posted 1/15/2014 9:37 PM (GMT 0)
That is just it Kate, You may not have a temporary issue. UC and anixety can come back only you. Part of you side effects could be withdraw with anxienty.

This is why we tell you to tallk to the doctor, everyone is different, no one has the same experience.

Stay strong
Trina
Posted 1/15/2014 9:51 PM (GMT 0)
I may not have a temporary issue, but it also may, in fact, BE a temporary issue. I understand UC quite well and I know it can come back. In fact it probably will at some time in my life. I just don't believe that if this is withdrawal that the solution will be to take more medications. I'm not feeling suicidal. Just uncharacteristically irritable, sad, and over-emotional. I have spoken to my therapist. She says this could very well be withdrawals and that it could take up to 3 months for my brain to level out. I'm going to hang in there and get through this and keep looking for hope.
Posted 1/15/2014 9:58 PM (GMT 0)
Well, good luck with that.

Yes, it can take time for the brain to re-set.

Have you spoken to the psych you are working with about a timetable? They might be your best resource.
Posted 1/15/2014 10:01 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, she said it could take about 3 months to feel more "steady". I just like to hear what other people who have gone through similar experiences have to say. If you mean my tapering schedule, she and I did that together.
Posted 1/15/2014 10:09 PM (GMT 0)
with that being said by Carl, Health becomes the next issue, pleanty of water, lots of it. Healthy fresh food diet. no fast foods. NO ALCOHOL should ease the side effects.

Trina
Posted 1/15/2014 10:13 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you, Carl- you've been very helpful today. And I am working with a therapist... and to give you more back story, I was never diagnosed with depression. A lot of times when you are diagnosed with a chronic disease (such as ulcerative colitis) they use a dual-therapy method. Stress induces flares, and so in order to keep the stress down doctors will prescribe anti-anxiety/anti-depressants. In fact, my primary care & gastroenterologist were the ones who suggested the Zoloft in the first place and at the time I was so worried about my new diagnosis and about feeling better I said "sure". It turns out that Zoloft is one of the most addictive ones out there, but back then I did no research at all. And I'm not even sure I ever felt less anxious. I definitely didn't have any of these angry, crying sessions (maybe the occasional ones for good reason) but I am not convinced that the Zoloft was something that was absolutely necessary. I'm not blaming all of my symptoms on my discontinuation, but I do think that behaviors are certainly magnified by it. And, with the help of my therapist, I am looking to alternative ways to deal with it that don't include medication. I made it VERY CLEAR that I did not want to get on medication again until after this 3 or 4 month or so mark. If in 3-4 months I haven't "bounced back" then I will have no qualms about getting back on something - but it won't be Zoloft. In the meantime, I'm going to continue to use my therapists' suggestions for breathing, meditation, exercise, and writing. I do believe that everyone's experience is different, and there are some people out there that have experienced what I have. To be clear again, I just wanted someone to relate to - not for someone to tell me that I am possibly taking the wrong path.
Posted 1/15/2014 10:22 PM (GMT 0)
Well, you can't ask for help and/or advice and then dictate what that help/advice might be. That's not how this thingie works. Sometimes, people looking at our stories can see things worth noting, that we might not see ourselves.

When I referenced the schedule earlier, I meant a time frame for how long it might take for your body to be fully rid of the medication.

Again, good luck and feel better soon.
Posted 1/15/2014 10:34 PM (GMT 0)
I understand what you're saying, but you can imagine my frustration when I clearly was looking for this "I need someone to tell me there's a light at the end of this tunnel and that I can find my old self without going back on medication." (from my original post) and instead received several replies suggesting I go back on medication.
Posted 1/16/2014 12:46 AM (GMT 0)
Most people with chronic illnesses do get depressed. If you felt good on the medication then you probably did have a degree of depression whether you knew it or not. I am not saying this isn't the discontinuation of the medication. It may be. But try to keep an open mind. You may need medication, you may not. Don't let it be the end of the world if you do. Try not to be totally against it. Like you said, if you don't feel better after a certain amount of time, try medication again. If you didn't have any side effects off of the zoloft, I think it would be smart to try it again if the need be. Why try another medication that might give you bad side effects.

I can honestly tell you none of us want to be on medications. None of us want to be depressed. But we are, so when we see your symptoms, we automatically think depression. Know that all of us are only trying to help you right now. That is why we recommend you talk to your therapist. If they gave you a three month window, that is probably what it is going to take. Trina gave you some good advice about relieving the symptoms. Drink a lot of water, it flushes things out of your system. No processed foods and no alcohol. Lemon water is the best if you can get lemons.

I know you aren't getting the answers you want. I am sorry about that. Maybe you should read more about depression and see what it says. Like I said before, keep an open mind. Do some roll reversal, take and make a list of your symptoms, pretend it is a friend who wants advice. Look up the symptoms and see what you get. Be objective about it.

I sure hope that you get better and don't need medications. I hope you aren't depressed. That is something I wouldn't wish on anybody. But you do need to stay on top of it. If you were to have to go on a low dose and taper off again, it isn't the end of the world. Maybe you came off of them too fast. I took zoloft before and had no trouble stopping. But I only took it for a few months because it gave me bad diarrhea and made me lose a bunch of weight. Most people gain weight from it. I am totally different. We are all different and we get different side effects, different results from the medication. No two people are the same with this. That is why we can't tell you what to expect. And the fact that most of us will be on medications for the rest of our lives, we can't give you an answer. I am sorry about that... But this is a good place for support if you need it. And everybody here cares about eachother. I wish you the best...

Hugs, Karen...
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