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Posted 8/5/2005 5:33 PM (GMT 0)
Hello everyone. First time poster here. It is a relief to find a forum with such kind, caring members.

A bit of background: I have been diagnosed with major depression, anxiety with panic attacks and agoraphobia. I also have an auto-immune disease.

I am presently under the care of a psychiatrist,and have been for the last year-and-a-half, but I am not feeling any better at all. I am also seeing a counselor for cognitive behavior therapy, which I feel is useless. I 'm sure my depression stems from (emotional) childhood traumas I have chosen to forget.

The reason I am writing this is to ask anyone on this board if they have went through ECT. My psychiatrist told me last year that if I do not start to respond to medication, he will have to "shock" me. I am terrified of having to go through this, and have been telling him what he wants to hear, just so he won't press the issue of making me go through these treatments. (He suspects by my history of taking anti-depressants, I have become "medication resistant.")

Any suggestions are appreciated. Thank you in advance.

Posted 8/5/2005 7:19 PM (GMT 0)
Hi willow,
Welcome!  I have not had ECT and to be honest I don't know too much about it.  I did do a google search for it though and found a site that you might find helpful  www.ect.org  
I'm sorry that you haven't been able to find so-called conventional treatment for your depression and I have the same fear that I won't respond to my medication anymore.  I just want you to know that we are a very caring bunch and I'm sure you will find support here. 
Keep posting and Take care
Posted 8/5/2005 9:26 PM (GMT 0)
Well, the only thing I can say, and I too have an auto-immune disease, that no amount of therapy will help if you are not honest in your sessions.
Posted 8/5/2005 11:50 PM (GMT 0)

Thanks, dbab, for your informative reply--I visited the website you suggested and learned many things. Fear of the unknown has been worse than actually having to go through with it. I definitely have some decisions to make. Again, thank you for your warm welcome, concern, and taking the time to help me.

As for CheerDad--at this point in time, I do not need a curt reply and dismissive attitude regarding my reluctance to therapy. Perhaps you could stoically agree to a therapy that can't be fully understood by medical science, but I need more options than this. Simply, save your judgment for someone else! 

Posted 8/6/2005 12:18 AM (GMT 0)
Hi willow,
I'm happy to help. I don't think that CheerDad meant any harm by his comment, it sounds as if he is concerned that you aren't doing yourself good by not being open and honest in therapy. My suggestion may be to possibly find another psychiatrist if you think that this one is not doing anything for you. I have gone through many therapists and some actually made me worse. (in fact a couple of marriage therapists rocked the boat even more in my relationship too) Maybe when you are searching for a new one, be up front with them before your first session and point blank ask them what are their thoughts on ECT. I am no expert but all doctors have different beliefs in different therapy and treatment and its very possible that you will find one that is more suited for you.
Good luck and take care
Posted 8/6/2005 12:47 AM (GMT 0)

Hi dbab--you're right, I shouldn't have "shot from the hip", as the old saying goes, in responding to CheerDad. It's just that I feel very fragile right now and a little TLC goes a long way with me these days. I feel very alone and no one seems to understand. Yes, I know I should be up front with my doctor, but fear of the ultimate outcome (ECT) has stood in the way.

Your suggestion about finding another doctor ia an excellent one. Trouble is, the town I live in isn't  exactly teeming with psychiatrists. (One, to be exact.)I'll spare you a sob story, but I'm not exactly in a position to travel out of area to another one. But your message has enlightened me enough to stand up for myself (I have always been intimidated by him) and ask: "I haven't tried all the anti-depressants available, and I'm clearly not responding to the medication I'm taking now, so why not try another? "

Thank you for the encouragement at a time when it is most needed. Wish me luck. To you, all the best.

Posted 8/6/2005 2:10 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Willow! Everyone here can relate in someway, I've found the caring tone and anonimity here to be quite helpful. You can express whats wrong without being judged for it and get some more opinions. I'd have to support the other doctor thing, but if that solution doesnt exactly work for you then just know you can always talk here. There is always someone listening. Good luck! Hope you feel better!
Posted 8/6/2005 2:30 PM (GMT 0)

Hi MindsEyeopen! It's so nice to meet you, and thank you for your well wishes. You are so right--it helps to have a place to go where one can post a problem and then receive caring, positive feedback.

I hope when I eventually find a medication therapy that works, I can begin to be of help to someone else--of course, I'm always available to listen!

Take care. Enjoy your day!

Posted 8/8/2005 4:59 PM (GMT 0)
I didn't mean anything other than therapy can't help if the therapist doesn't know whta the true issues are. Sorry if it sounded curt.
Posted 8/13/2005 3:51 AM (GMT 0)
bump by request
Posted 8/13/2005 10:27 AM (GMT 0)
nono  Willow,

Welcome to the group. I hope you can find comfort here.

 

Please do not allow them to use EST. When I was in in-patient anger control. I saw how some of the patients looked when they were done for the day. They were spaced out, unresponsive and worst of all, lathargic. Please ask your doc for another alternitive. I say this out of care.

Hugs

"Lefty"

AKA, Sue 

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