Had to go to my brother's place. And I'm tired after not a particularly fun few hours.
@Jennie - I wasn't a foster child and passed from family to family: I can hardly imagine that particular hell and am not at all surprised that children in care statistically fare worse on every front you care to name. On top of it, stuff like this makes me despair of the human race:
My gma would always tell me I should go back to where I came from, oh wait you can't bc your an orphan. The kids at school said my birth mom gave me up bc I was too ugly for her to want me or bc I was a nobody. I was also told I was so awful that my birth mom didn't die of cancer to liver no she ended her life to get away from me.I don't even know why people do that crap. The part which makes me despair about
human nature is they get a
kick out of it: they actually do it for fun. That's the part I can't forgive, personally.
I know this forum is to support others and I know a lot of people support others by saying encouraging words such as "don't give up" "it'll get better" etc etc but my way of support is different, my way of support is by telling you I totally get you, by telling you some of the awful things I've went through, to me it's those kids of things that help me. For me when I'm told encouraging words when I'm in the slum of my life it just makes me think "psh yeah ok" instead of me thinking "wow, someone gets me" or "wow, I can really relate to you & your stories" Yeah, I'm not good on the motivational scene either. The cynical, snarky side of my brain can outsnark anything. I can understand "don't give up" and "hope things get better", but most 'inspirational' psychology just makes me want to bash my head. One thing I do know from posting on the Crohn's/UC boards is that thoughtless words really do drive some people mad. Things like "you look so well!" or "feel better soon!". Their reasoning is that they neither
feel well, nor are they likely to feel better soon. I think too much can be read into casual phrases, but I do take where they are coming from. Whether it's a physical or mental disease, it can feel hollow when you are told cheerily to "feel better soon" or whatever.
Also, nobody can promise you that it will get better. Sometimes it doesn't.
Anyway, I'm getting tireder and tireder here, and having an increasingly hard time thinking. My concentration span is not good. Sorry I'm gonna have to wind this up for now.
Edit: Sorry if that was a tad abrupt. I'm just so often tired and not up to speaking a lot. It is nothing personal at all and I'm like it with everyone. Hell, most of the time I'm too tired to write about
myself, even; I was going to start a blog and never did in the end. So when I am too tired to feel like talking to another person, it is not because of anything they have said or done in the slightest: I'm just wired to be an introvert who tires easily.
Post Edited (NiceCupOfTea) : 4/9/2014 5:32:29 PM (GMT-6)