HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

miscarriage

Support Forums
>
Depression
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 5/27/2014 10:32 PM (GMT 0)
I know that people don't seem to want to touch the subject of miscarriage with a ten foot pole, but I really need someone to talk to. First let me start out by saying, when I was 18 my best friend called be sunshine because I was happy all the time. I am now 34 and I am one big storm cloud all the time. I have two beautiful boys 14 and 3, and a great husband. My husband had a vasectomy after I had my little guy, but had it reversed last aug. We got pregnant in Nov and lost the baby at 13 weeks in Jan. I had a d&c and had the baby cremated. Now my cycles are messed up and we cannot seem to get pregnant. Last Friday, I took a test and it was positive!! I was sooo happy. Then, the next day I started my period which meant that the pregnancy didn't stick (chemical pregnancy). This is not the one incident that set me off. I have been depressed for a while now, but the miscarriage and now this has me so down. I am treating my hubby like crap and can't seem to stop losing my temper on my little one. I have no friends at all. I work alone ( I am a nanny and a 1 year old can't exactly have a conversation) and then I come home. That's it. I feel like I wanna throw everything in my house! I am losing my mind. I am sure that no one on here really cares either but I thought I would give it a shot. Why would God take away my baby and then make it so I can't have another? Why does it seem that everything in my world is wrong?
Posted 5/27/2014 10:42 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,

Welcome to the depression forum. Maybe you should wait a little while (couple months) before you try having a baby again. It seems like your body would need to heal from the dnc... But I could be totally wrong.

It sounds like you could use a talk with your doctor and find out if this is indeed depression or a hormonal thing. That way you would know the right way to treat it.

Talk to your hubby. Let him know what is going on with you. Otherwise he could get the wrong message and think you don't care. Same with the little one. Take some quality time with him and you will feel better all the way around.

You have suffered a huge loss and it may be that you need to grieve all the way. It is hard to say, you have a lot of disappointments right now. It is only normal that you would feel bad about it. Take it slow, one day at a time. Then go from there. Wait just a little while before getting pregnant again. See what your body is trying to tell you.

I wish you the best...

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 5/27/2014 11:32 PM (GMT 0)
Its hard. I've had 2 miscarriahes and they are heart wrenching. My dr said something that helped a little. He said that normally a miscarriage happens because something happened during development that would have made life for that child a misery. It still hurts but no parent wants to see their child in pain.

Check with your dr and make sure your hormones are levelling back out. It could be stress. It probably wouldn't hurt to see a therapist. Its a hard loss and you need a healthy vent. Don't let this fester inside. Talk to your husband. He's probably hurting, too. Keep posting. I'm always around if you need to talk.
Posted 5/28/2014 1:32 AM (GMT 0)
Hello .....

   This is a comment from the archives.

   Do you believe you cannot have another child? My former wife and I went thru a miscarriage and DnC in 1980 ..... and it was a boy who I had already named (way too early) - but we lost him.

   We had a daughter in 1976, and even after the horrifying experience in 1980, we did have another daughter in 1985. So ...... she did conceive again even though it was 5-years later - and she was older than you.

   Try to keep some hope alive, and try to give it some time without pressure added on either yourself or your husband.

P.S. - the 1985 baby of ours is now a very successful 28-year old girl who is having a wonderful life - filled with excitement and rewarded with hard work.

Peace and wellness

Rob & Gizmo

 

Posted 5/28/2014 5:15 PM (GMT 0)
Welcome to the forum.

SO sorry you have suffered miscarriages.

I do believe that you ought to wait awhile and heal emotionally and physically before trying again.

You won't want to hear this, however, count your blessings. You have 2 wonderful children and a husband who sticks by you. Many do not have that. There are women out there who want children and can not have them at all. You can always adopt a third if you want.

We all have struggles and sufferings in life to get through. No one knows why they are. Usually we know the reason in time.
Do not beat yourself up for this.

Peace and courage
Trina
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply