Just a little note...

Hi Everyone,

Thanks to those of you who were so supportive a couple weeks back. You honestly helped to save my life. After the depression, i swung into a hypomanic state, still working on getting back to "normal" for me anyway. But, I'm doing ok. I think.

Just in the past week, I have had multiple doc appts with different kinds of docs, mixed kinds of news (good and bad). I am dealing alright at the moment, just feel like I am waiting for it to all come crashing down on me. Going to try to stay on top of things, pay attention/look for any warning signs or indications that things are starting to go south, and do my best to take care of me. Here's what's been happening:

GI: going to go forward to surgery to remove part or all of colon, have some type of ostomy (permanent) in the end. Just have to go thru testing to determine what, if anything is worth saving. Increased some meds and decided to do a bowel "purge" every 10 days or so. Surgery will not happen for several months.

Pain Clinic: waiting on insurance to approve another "test" injection, and then RFA/nerve burning procedure in my lower back. Worked pretty well the last time, so hoping it will work even better this time.

Dental: 2 teeth worked on the other day, surgery spot looks healthy, 2 1/2 months until we know if bone graft is a success. Then have to meet with regular dentist and specialist to come up w/ plan to remove all of my teeth and do implant system over the next few years. Teeth are ruined from 20 years of meds with horrible dry mouth problems (i'm only 36). A little shocking--not quite mentally ready to hear that stuff. But I trust both dentists, & was told we're at the point where it becomes foolish to spend more $$ to try to save teeth, they are really past the point of being able to save them for any significant length of time.

Primary care: have a pinched nerve somewhere in my left arm or left side of my neck. Not sure exactly where at this point. Tingling started in thumb, 2 months ago, has now moved up all the way to my shoulder. Sent me to hand therapist to get a special splint. They said try to wear it and rest my thumb, arm, neck. Return in 6 weeks, sooner if it gets worse. Need it to get better. i can't handle another problem!!

Psychiatrist: got lab results back. Lithium level is at the very top end of normal. Doc isn't pleased with that. Also, White Blood Cell count is up again, so probably some infection going on somewhere. Don't know where. I just hope it's not starting up in my jaw again, I can't lose any more bone!! But, will repeat tests in 2 weeks to see where things are at.

Headache Clinic: decreased one of my migraine preventative meds, think I'm ok. Have had more headaches lately, but not migraines.

So, now that you know all my updated medical stuff, I will thank you for listening and I gotta get to bed, it's after 1:00am here.

It seems weird to me, that I'm hanging in there mentally/emotionally with all this stuff. Just worried that it's just a matter of time before I fall apart. Cannot afford to do that. Any suggestions or advice on how to avoid crashing?

Hope everyone's doing the best they can right now, remember to enjoy even the tiniest little happy moments. And you are not allowed to give up! If I wasn't allowed, neither are any of you!! Thanks again for all the kindness and support.


Sunny.

our medical is as bad as each others sunny. that's it mate, never surrender, never say die, keep looking forwards and never ever look back. 'may the force be with you'. been quoting star-wars.

Way to be proactive and on top of your medical issues. This alone will help with depression.

Be proud, we are. We will always be here, you are not alone.

Peace
Trina

Hey Sunny you sound good to me. Things aren't always perfect, but we do the best we can with what we got. I hope that the purge makes you feel better in the long run. I am imagining it is like drinking that stuff before a colonoscopy. Though I could be wrong. I know it does clean you out. That is for sure.

I wonder though if you are a little detached or if you are learning to cope. I hope it is the latter.

I am glad that you have a good support team. That is so important. We have to be a part of that team too and I think you are doing a good job. Keep up the good work.

Sorry about your filling. Usually if one comes out, you will feel the open space somewhere with your tongue. You will notice it is sharp somewhere. Hopefully that did not happen. But either way, kudos to you for putting it on the back burner until you can talk to the dentist on Monday. Frees your mind up for other things.

Take care Sunny, have a good evening.

Hugs, Karen...