glad I'm getting new med nurse

I called the last med nurse i had back in april when I felt major panic attack coming on. Instead of calling me between patients she waited till the end of the day to call me back. I had to go to emergency room before she called. Then the next time I saw her I told her i was sleeping all day and just lying around and she said well your on a good med it should work for you and I want to see you smiling next time you are in here.( I had an urge to punch her in her stupid face) I just noticed i was running kinda low on my lorazepam so after looking at the bottle saw it was only for 45 pills. It said take 2 and a half pills a day..that equals 90 a month so I went to the pharmacy and they checked the script and that is what she wrote it for(45). Can't wait till the 29th when i see new med nurse. I am going to tell her what the last one did.
I am really struggling with my depression and my husband doesn't get it. It pisses him off that i just lie around all day. Then he says something about it and i start crying and he says "oh stop your darn blubbering". Tonight when he went up to bed he did not even kiss me good night or say I love you. So I have been crying off and on for 4 hours.

So sorry you are in such a dark place right know.
Know that you are not alone. Many of us have been where you are. It does pass.

There is a saying, "Move your muscles and the mind will follow"
This is a hard difficult coping skill. However, you must force yourself up and out of the house for at least a 10 min walk. This will change your perspective. Walk mindfully, be aware of the ground as your feet make contact. What smells are there? What do you hear? What do you See. Smile at people and say hello. The smiles back will do you wonders!

When you get back home, write about what just occured. Everything you remember and how it felt. Just keep writing, you may be surprise to see yourself writing about your depressed feeling, go with. Releasing your emotions this way is very healthy.

If you see a therapist, talk to them about what you wrote. Good fodder for sessions.

Keep posting here and let us know if you try this skill. I do hope that you make the hard effort.

Peace and strength
Trina

Thanks all. the feedback does help. I had therapist apt. yesterday which got me up an out of the house which also helped some. Feeling a little better this morning may even go to the state fair one day this week.

Hi crazyhazeynut,

I'm glad that the feedback helps and that you were able to get up and out of the house and that doing that helps also. Both things can be very helpful to us when we're dealing with a lot.

Going to the state fair one day this week sounds like a great idea! I hope you're able to do it and get a chance to get out, feel better and have some fun.

Sending hugs your way in case you need them.