My ex texted me, feel worse than ever

Hi everyone,
I'm new to the depression part of this forum. For months now my depression has been more under control, but a few days ago, I got an out of the blue text from my ex which has set everything back.

We talked for a while and she was being so, so nice to me, and this made me feel like crap because I know I'll never meet anyone half as caring as her ever again. And her life is going so well, and I'm so jealous and heartbroken because I want her to miss me, but seems like things are getting really serious with her new partner.

We broke up over a year ago and so I should be over all this by now. Her message made me realise everything I lost when she dumped me, and how much I miss her and that I still do love her. She was my world and yet she can just move on and be happy again with someone else. I've been sobbing ever since and can't speak to anyone or do anything, and I just really want to die right now.

I am going to try and see friends as much as possible to keep busy, but that only works for a short while and then when I'm alone I fall apart again. And I have no motivation to work.

I know this is just yet another pathetic break-up story and I'm being silly, but I'm scared it's reactivated my depression on a more permanent basis, and could use some encouragement.

welcome to the forum.

Perhaps this is a wake up call for you.

Loving yourself is more important than loving someone else. It sounds like you put all you happiness into one person in the past.

To be truely happy you must find it within yourself. No one person can do this for you.

Therapy is a good start, doing things you like. Doing things you always wanted to do, but never did.

Peace
Trina

This is why seeing a therapist would be helpful.

Start with your family doctor. explain how depressed you are.

If you do not have a family doctor, your insurance has a list of mental health practioners you can call and make an appointment with.

If you have no insurance you can try a clinic near by, one of the urgent care places or if you go to church even you don't go to church you can try a minister, pastor, priest to talk to.

Also on our Resource page at the top of the forum there are contact numbers for help agencies.

Please be proactive and try some of these resources. There are many people out in the world that care and will help you.

You are NOT alone.

Peace
Trina

Thank you, you're all so kind.

Thing is I've had a great year. Being single has had its perks, I can be intimate with who I want, I've made some amazing new friends who made me forget how I want to die... but any reminder of her sends me right back to square one.

I genuinely don't think I'll ever be over her and that kills me. I wish she missed me too. I'd give anything for her to realise that she needs to be with me, nobody else.

Hello .......

   Virtually all of us have lost a love. Nearly all of us - more than once. It's never easy. You can't expect your feelings to just go away by themselves in time. It rarely happens.

   What too often is the case, as an example, is one person hangs on never really dealing with the loss ... and maybe temporarily getting busy enough not to think about it!

   So ...... it keeps coming back. I know of one person who kept doing that for 19-years! She never did deal with that loss .... and died without having that peace of mind - much less being able to move on into a different relationship.

   We all need help getting thru those difficult times. It's usually best thru a professional - like a talk counselor.

   That has been mentioned here by several people - including possibly where to look.

   Please seek that help.

Rob & Gizmo