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Posted 7/25/2014 2:52 AM (GMT 0)
Hi there. I was recently diagnosed with PTSD and depression. I have been in and out of foster care my entire life, and at one point I was adopted, though they decided they didn't want me anymore after years of torturing me. I have been raped five different times. I have no idea who it was this last time, and the police cant do anything about it. This has triggered a lot with me. I have been constantly thinking about death. Its all I can do to get out of bed, because I know that today is just going to be another day. Something else is going to happen. I lost my job after I was attacked, because I started carrying pepper spray, and apparently that's considered a weapon. I can no longer pay my bills. I have no family, no friends. I have nothing. And I'm just at a point where I'm not sure what else to do. I have no fight left in me, nothing left to give.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 7/25/2014 4:03:09 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 7/25/2014 10:02 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Storm,

I am sorry but I had to take a few sentences out of your post because they were kind of descriptive and that can trigger others emotions. I hope you can understand. It doesn't make your situation any less important. And you have been through a lot.

I hope you are going to counseling at this time. It is really important that you have support.

Know that there is nothing wrong with you or I should say you haven't done anything wrong. Know you are a good person who didn't deserve what has happened. I am sorry for your hurt.

I think counseling would validate your feelings and make you stronger. You have been through some bad things, and unfair things. But that does not define who you are and neither does your depression.

You may have lost friends, and lost your job, but you still have you and that is a lot. I think therapy could help you in a lot of ways. I hope you are going.

You need a lot of support right now. I am glad that you have found us. Try not to think the worse about tomorrow, it will come and it will work itself out. Are you working at the present time?

I really hope that things get better for you and that you can find peace.

Hugs, Karen...
Posted 7/25/2014 3:22 PM (GMT 0)
Welcome to the forum. You are very brave to reach out for help.
Here is a link that I hope with give you more help.

www.dailystrength.org/c/Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder/support-group

I can empathize with what you have gone through. I was abused for 16years by my family so I can relate to the feeling that something else will happen. You will learn in time that you can keep yourself safe. Get stronger and fight the fear.

If you can not afford a therapist, I suggest you find a clinic or try a local church for pastorial conceling.

You are NOT alone. It is sad, but many people, man and women have been through what you have. They are out there and together you can help each other heal. Starting here is great.

A support group is the 2nd step for validation and knowing you are not alone.

Peace and strength
Trina
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